Leaders of the Irken Empire
by Dawn of Twilight
Summary: Follow along...from the begginnings to the failure of Impending Doom One and beyond. The collection of minifanfics are my first of the Invader Zim genre, hope you enjoy! Ch:14 is up, sorry for taking so long in updating :P
1. Beginnings

**Hello All! Hope you enjoy the story. Heads up though, this is a fanfiction that I am writing with two of my friends. We all came up with our own fancharacters. This story is just a collection of chapters that I have written and so will mostly revolve around my character, Almight Tallest Kai. So a few times during this story, it will seem like I'm skipping alot, but I am not. The parts that are seemingly missing, are actually told through the POV of my friends characters in their chapters. We actually have our own website that holds all of are fanfic chapters as well as character pictures on it. But it hasn't been updated in quite awhile (we are slackers to the end) And so newly madepictures and chapters have not been uploaded yet.Anyhow, You'll be introduced to my friends characters later on in the story. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Invader Zim. Or the characters of Mah and Ren. I do, however own Kai.**

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**-Zap!-**

**The inactive pak on the smeet's back was activated by the robotic arm.**

"**Welcome to life Irken child, Report for duty." The computer said.**

"**Duty?" The smeet asked, somewhat confused.**

**The computer did not respond, instead another robotic arm picked up the smeet and dropped it down a chute.**

**-Whoosh-**

**The smeetling suddenly found itself in a chair, with random cables hooked up into it's pak.**

"**Prepare to be filled with the all the Knowledge of the Great Irken Race." A different computer voice said. The smeet shut down as information started to course from the computer into the Irken child's pak. The smeet jerked and twitched a bit as the downloading commenced. It stops and she wakes up.**

**The computer voice said, "Upload complete. You have been given a name. IDENTIFY YOURSELF."**

"**I am Kai." The smeet replied.**

**With those words said, some robotic arms remove her from the chair, another Irken smeet landing in it as soon as she leaves. Some how knowing where to go next, Kai heads over to the basic training facility, only 5 minutes after settling in, the power on the entire planet of Irk goes out…**

**A few years later…**

"**Alright!" Kai smiled triumphantly. She currently had the highest score in the battle tactics simulations. But it didn't last long, her blue eyes narrowed when a new score replaced her own. She didn't know who this "Red" was, but she would beat Them. A few minutes later shewas once more the one who had the highest score.Which soon was short lived as "Red" knocked her back to second. She growled and slipped off the holo visors just a bit. Spying on her fellow Irken trainees, she stopped and stared at the one seated on the other side of the room from her. Kai had a fairly good idea at who "Red" was now. Like herself, the red-eyed Irken was taller than the other Irkens in the room. He slipped off his visor and gave her a smirk. Shegrowled back, Kai knew a challenge when she saw one. She was not about to let this Red beat her. Switching the settings on the simulation, she soon was in multiplayer mode with Red as her enemy. Now they would see who was the better. In the hours that followed, she battled her rival, their scores constantly switching. But Kai made a fatal mistake in her tactics, something Red was quick to jump on. She knew it was over, when suddenly they both were beaten. **

"**What?" Both yelled as the name "Purple" replaced "Red" as the highest score, knocking Kai from second to third. Slipping off the visors, she glared at the only one who could have been called Purple. He gave her a cheery wave, an extremely smug look gracing his face.**

**Apparently, while Red and Kai were bashing each other, Purple had built up his forces waiting for the right moment to strike. Kai mentally slapped herself from not paying attention to the other Irkens that could have joined in their multiplayer simulation.**

**Purple smirked as both Red and Kai fumed and cursedat him. He knew that they were better than him at battle tactics, which was why he bided his time before making a move. Perfect timing too, for a voice announced that battle simulation was over, so there was no chance that either one of them could knock him off the first place. At least not until tomorrow.**

**Many more years later…**

"**By Irk, I'm late" Kai said to herself, dashing through the hallways. The newest Tallest was suppose to be giving his addressing speech. It was strange but Almighty Miyuki had vanished without a trace. After a few more years (the control brains took the job as Tallest and halted all invasions and huge ventures until they decided on a new one.) The Tallest was finally decided, and now here she was, late for Tallest Spork's speech. Kai heard a strange crash coming from the auditorium, and shoved open the doors. Only to yell in surprise at the huge blobby thing that was rampaging around. Her yell brought the blob's attention to her, and Kai soon found herself racing down the halls with the monster after her. With much skill on her part and a little bit of sheer luck, the energy blob was contained.**

**Like all Irkens above a certain height, Kai had to go before the control brain to have her height measured. But a new Tallest was not announced. Meaning the there must have been a tied in height among a few Irkens, that meant that the Brains were going to wait a while to see if any of the chosen Irkens grew taller. Kai was one of the candidates for the honor of being a Tallest, but she did not let that go to her head. 'After all, I'm almost reaching maturity. Which means I most likely won't be able to increase in height any longer.' Kai figured that Red or Mah would be chosen, for while she was on of the tallest Irkens to be measured, they were a few inches taller than her.**

**Year and a half later...**

"**Commander!"**

"**Hmmm?"**

"**Did you hear the messag-," Kai interrupted the technician with "Not now, I'm busy."**

**The technician, though anxious to deliver the message, kept silent while trying to see what the commander was doing. 'She might be the next tallest…' the technician thought, for while Kai did not notice, she had grown a foot, maybe more, during thetime that she was aboard the Scouter. Like the name suggested, it's purpose was to scout the edge of the empire for any planets or trouble that might interest the Empire. Kai was the commander of the ship, her being the tallest one aboard it.**

"**Commander!" The Irken said, trying once again to relay the message.**

"**Hang on." Kai replied, waving the technician away with her hand.**

**The technician was now extremely curious to see what she was doing. Extending his robotic spider legs, he was able to view the top of the table. There were battle plans spread out along the table, but Kai was not focusing on that. No, she was focusing on a mysterious white box that also laid on the table.**

"C**ommander, it can't wait, there's an urgent message from the Contro," But the technician was once again interrupted.**

"**What type of filling do you think this donut has? I can't tell from the outside and I really don't want to ruin it by cutting it open."**

**The technician fell over when he realized that the white box was filled with donuts. Kai looked down at him and frowned.**

"**You might want to get those roboticlegs check, I don't believe they are suppose to do that." She commented.**

**The Irken technician quickly got up, he should not have been surprised. Brilliant as the commander was, she still had the attention span of a smeetand was easily distracted. Especially if it involved snacks in any way, shape, or form. Kai finally noted his expression, "What?" she asked.**

"**You have received a transmission to return to Irk. It is important, it came from the Control Brains themselves."**

**Kai stared thoughtfully into space. "Alright, set coordinates towards Irk." She said with a wave of her hand. The technician nodded and left. 'Interesting, I guess I'm still a candidate for Tallest. That would be the only reason why the Brains asked for my presences...I think this is theblojaenian jellyfilled one.' Kai thought picking out the donut.**

**Some time later...**

**Kai waited patiently for the measuring to be completed. She stood in front of the Control Brain, as a cable running from it to her pak was working to take her height and store it for comparison to any other Irken called back.**

"**Vexing." The brains said.**

"**Hmm?" Kai asked as the cable disconnected from her pak.**

"**You have reached maturity? Yes?"**

"**Ummm…yes…I believeso, would that not be recorded in my pak?"**

**The Control Brain gave no answer as it silently debated. 'It is the same height as the other two. Even using the smallest unit possible, they are all three the exact same height.' Right Brain communicated to Left. 'Perhaps a re-measuring is in order?' Left asked Right. **

**Within minutes the sound of the door sliding open drew Kai's attention to it.**

"**You!" she said at the same time as the newcomer did. Red and Kai looked at each other, abit uneasy as both noticed that they looked exactly the same height. Their gawking was interrupted by the sound of the door sliding open again. In walked Purple, eating from a bag of popcorn. "You too?" Red and Kai called out at the same time. Purple might have had said the same thing, but it was not recognizable as his mouth was full of popcorn.**

**Standing beside each other, they waited while the cables extended again to measure their height. Kai looked over at Purple, or more specifically, the bag of popcorn. "Where did you get the popcorn?" She asked.**

**When the measuring was done, all three waited. But the control brain said nothing. It was debating again.**

'**Yes, and all three have passed maturity, so there will not be a any sort of chance of one actually being taller than the other two.' Left said to Right.**

'**Indeed, and no other Irkens, that have not reached maturity yet, are even close to their height.'**

'**It is vexing'**

'**It has not happened before'**

'**Is it possible?'**

**If it could, the right brain would have shrugged. 'It is law. The time of deciding is over.'**

'**Indeed. It will be done.'**

"**Soooo…who is taller?" Red asked, reaching for another hand full of popcorn.**

"**You three are the new Almighty Tallest." The Control Brain proclaimed.**

**All three of them froze.**

"**What?" They asked in unison.**

"**It is decided."**

**The platforms started to sink into a lower level, taking the three new Tallests with them.**

**Still stunned, Kai stood once again before the control brains, this time clothed in the armor and robe of an Almighty Tallest, instead of her normal commander's outfit. Red and Purple were equal still in shock. She glanced at their new upgraded pak and knew that hers was upgraded in the same way. It had been a weird feeling for all the new data and other upgrades to have been uploaded into her pak. As well as being taken off the general network system that all other Irken's paks were on. 'This is so strange…' Kai thought to herself. 'But man, I'm hungry.'**

**A few hours later…**

"**Wiggle your antenna in salute, for here they are. Your all knowing, all powerful leaders, The Almighty Tallests."**

**The crowd of Irkens were stunned for a split second as the platform floated down from the ceiling bearing not one, but three new Tallests. But soon they started to cheer wildly.**

"**This is going to be interesting…"Kai muttered to the other two, while waving a hand at the crowd. Red and Purple nodded in agreement.**

"**What are we going to do first?" Red asked.**

"**Let's go eat food, I don't know about you, but I'm hungry!" Purple added.**

**Kai and Red thought about that and nodded, they were too.**

**After the ceremony….**

"**Now what?" Red asked, as the trio settled in their new, private quarters.**

"**I don't know, I've always followed a Tallest, never thought I would become one." Kai said, testing out the new hover feature in her belt.**

"**Wheee!" Purple said, hovering wildly around the room.**

**Splat!**

**Red shook his head, but Kai said "Come on, you know you want to…Well," she looked at Purple, who had collided with the wall, "Except for that part…"**

**She joined Purple in hovering around the room, it wasn't long before Red joined.**

**After a while he asked again "But seriously, what are we going to do?"**

"**The others gave out orders." Purple said**

"**So what orders should we give out?"**

"**I don't know Red," Kai replied as she explored the rooms, "Perhaps we should come out with an outline of sort of what we want and need to be accomplished for the Empire."**

"**That's an idea Kai, we could always use more planets." Red replied.**

"**We would need more invaders and soldiers though." Purple added. "What do you think Kai?"**

"**Kai?" Red called out. The two looked around for the blue Tallest.**

**The sound of something crinkling drew them over to a room with the door partly opened. Inside was a extreme amount of snacks, with Kai hovering around the room wildly, grabbing and eating random things. She attempted to say something, but was foiled due to the fact that her mouth was full. It did not really matter, for soon Purple joined her in the consuming of the snacks.**

"...**" Red shook his head, but wasn't long in joining his fellow tallest in the snacking.**

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**Some of the inspiration for this story I got from reading the script of 'The Trial' episode. I understand that the process of being a Tallest may not be accurate, but this is my fanfiction after all...**

**Anyhow, I have 13 more chapters that are finished and that I'll be adding eventually. Reviews are appreciated, stories are written to be read **


	2. Impending Doom One: Failure

**Okay, run down of the fan characters. From my best friend Rai: Ren-An Irken female who is an inch or two taller than Zim. She's an Invader, and of the three,the most level headed. Her eyes are purple, as is her uniform, which also has the invader symbol on the front of the shirt. Other than that, looks the same as the other Invaders uniforms. Link: Mah. Another Irken female, is about a foot shorter than the Tallest themselves. Is the head technician, eyes are red. And while she's brilliant with technology, she seems to always be on a sugar high. Hyper and possessing a short attention span.(Basically the Irken version of my friend herself ) **

**Disclaimer: Don't own Invader Zim. Or Ren and Mah**

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**The three leaders of the Irken Empire were lounging around, having already started their first operation in motion…**

"**Thearan, that's such a cool name." Kai said out loud.**

"**I think it went well." Red said**

**Purple nodded. For their first operation, and largest undertaking, since they had become the Almighty Tallest, the assigning did go quite well.**

"**Wait! WAIT!"**

**The three turned and looked around for the source of that voice, but did not see anyone. "Where did it come from?" Purple wondered out loud.**

"**My Tallest down here! It's me, ZIM!"**

**Purple and Red groaned quietly as Kai looked straight down. Indeed, there was an Irken there.**

"**Ummm…Yes?" she asked**

"**My assignment!"**

**Kai studied the one called Zim, a bit confused. Only the Invaders had been given assignments.**

"**You're an Invader?"**

"**Yes!"**

**Kai looked to Red and Purple for their input on the matter. They were looking at Zim in shock.**

"**You are?" They yelled in stereo.**

"**Yes! I AM ZIM!"**

**Purple and Red shuddered and looked at Kai, who was still staring at Zim.**

'**There's no way, he's too short for an Invader. Lets find out if what he says is true.'**

**She thought. Bending down she grabbed Zim's head to hold him still.**

"**Computer! Encoding check!"**

**At her command a cable shot out from the ceiling and hooked into Zim's pak. Indeed, the screen showed that he was encoded as being in Invader class.**

"**There's no way..." Red muttered under his breath.**

**Kai released Zim as the cable went back into the ceiling. She started to look over her computerized clipboard thingy.**

"**What's to be my mission? My misSION!"**

"**I don't trust him with a planet." Red muttered to Purple.**

"**I wouldn't trust him with a pile of dirt. He practically destroys everything he touches." Purple muttered back.**

**Kai solved the problem by stating, "There's no more planets."**

"**WHAT?" Zim exclaimed.**

**Kai gave her clipboard another look over. "Yup. The assigning was two hours ago. All planets involved in this operation have already been assigned."**

"**WHAT?"**

"**There are no more planets Zim."**

"**WHAT?"**

**Kai slapped a hand to her head, this Irken was starting to give her a headache. She tried one more time, "You aren't going to be assigned a planet."**

**Red and Purple let out a small sigh of relief.**

"**That can't BE!"**

"**Zim, it's not our fault that you were late. You should have tried harder." Kai continued.**

**An Irken soldier appeared at the door. "My Tallest, sorry for the interruption, but what would you like done with the prisioners?"**

**Forgetting about Zim, all three focused their attention on the soldier.**

"**What?" Red asked**

"**What would you like to do with the people we caught trying to start up a riot?"**

"**What riot?"**

**The soldier shrugged and said, "The one in which they go around saying 'down with the Irken Empire.' And such."**

"**Oh. Throw them out an airlock." Purple said. For that was one of the easier ways of dealing with such problems.**

**Kai looked at him and replied, "We are planet side. There are no airlocks to throw them out of."**

"**Oh yeah…Throw them in prison and when we get back on the Massive, then throw them out an airlock."**

"**Works for me." Red replied, Kai nodded.**

**The soldier saluted and left.**

"**How do these people get on Irk anyways?" Red asked.**

**Kai shrugged, "They are survivors from spaceships that are shot down for getting to close to the planet."**

**Purple nodded, "One of these days we are going to have to hunt them all down and destroy them."**

"**I agree." Kai started to say. None of the Tallests noticed Zim as he quickly ran out of the room. "When we get around to it. They are just annoying. They don't cause many problems."**

"**Barely any." Purple added.**

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"**Snack time!" Kai called out, bringing in a platter.**

**Red eyed it suspiciously, "What is it?"**

"**Something I made." Kai said happily.**

"**But what is it?" Purple asked again using a finger to prod it.**

**Kai frowned a little.**

"**Geeze, it's just something I whipped up."**

"**The last time you whipped something up, it took me two days to recover." Red stated.**

**Kai growled a little and replied "Oh, you should talk. The last time you were in the kitchen, it took five technicians three days to fix and clean up the damage."**

**Purple snickered, that was true.**

**Red glared at the violet Tallest, "What are you laughing about? The last time you made something, none of us were able to try it due to the fact that it was running around the room." As an after thought Red added, "Not that I wanted to eat it, nothing should have been that color…"**

"**Hey!" Purple started, but stopped when the ground shook hard. Argument forgotten, the Tallests looked at each other, confused.**

"**Did the ground just shake?" Red asked.**

**In answer, the ground shook again, this time stronger and now more frequently. The windows and walls started to crack and shatter, and screaming could be heard from outside.**

"**What's going on? We can't be under attack from enemy ships!" Purple exclaimed. He rushed to the widow, and Kai and Red followed close behind him. They watched in stunned silence as a battle mech was stomping around and firing lasers outside.**

"**Is that one of our Battle Mechs?" Kai asked.**

"**I think so…" Purple relied slowly.**

"**That can't be right, only Irken invaders can operate that class of Mech. What idiot would be crazy enough to rampage their own planet?" Kaiasked out loud.**

"**ZIM!" Red suddenly called out, with more than a little anger in his voice.**

"**No! Not that cafeteria!" Purple exclaimed as a laser tore through it.**

"**Incoming!" Kai shouted, and they all moved out of the way as a stray beam tore through the building.**

**They shouted in unison as the area they were in started to collapse and crumble. The Tallests threw up their personal shields from their paks as the rubble started to pile up around the three.**

"**Argh! That stupid Irken!" Red shouted, using his growing rage to help blow off the top layer of the rubble off of them. Kai tried to free herself, but the debris pinned her down. Soon, though, another Irken Invader appeared with her SIR unit. They rushed up and helped the Tallest free themselves. Kai mentally took note of the Invader to properly thank her later. For right now, she wanted revenge.**

"**He'll pay.." She snarled.**

**Giving some last minute orders to Ren, they stalked off, all three using their spider legs to help move quickly around and through the rubble. Needless to say, none of the Tallest were happy.**

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**I understand that Impending Doom one didn't go this way, and that the Tallest are never known to use their paks. But this is my fanfic, hoped you enjoyed! Review if you want :)**


	3. Post ch 2: Aftermath

I added this chapter as an afterthought and to better meld in with what my friend was writing in her part. She mentioned Zim's trial in her story, and I had just seen the Frycook episode (awesome episode by the way) and loved the flashback to his first trial so much, that I felt I needed to add it in. So the bulk of this is from that flashback. The chapter is actually much longer, but there was too much editing that I wanted to do on it, so I just erased the whole thing on here, and just left the last part.

Disclaimer: Don't own Invader Zim or any of it's character, or the characters of Ren and Mah. (Even though those two don't really have a big part in my chapters until later)

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**Judgementia: **

"**Irken Invader Zim, for single handly ruining Operation Impending Doom One," The Control Brain started, but Zim interrupted.**

"**But I blew up more than any other invaders!"**

**"You blew up the other Invaders!" Red exclaimed, angerly.**

**It had taken all their self control not to throttle the Invader on the way to Judgementia.Especially whenimpudent Irken had said that he should be honored and rewarded for his success in the Operation. And then went on to say how lucky the Tallest were to have such a superior Invader serving them. It didn't help that Red and Purple had past issues with Zim during the their time in the training facility; or that Kai kept bringing up the fact that Zim had dropped a building on top of them, and that they should be entitled to maim him at least a little.**

**Zim waved aside Almighty Red's comment.**

"**You will no longer be of Invader class, but be re-encoded for the food industry and be forever banished to Foodcourtia." The brain continued with its sentence.**

"**But, Zim needs no vacation." Zim said confused as he was taken away.**

**The Tallest smirked at each other, for that would be the last they would have to see of Zim...**

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	4. Chapter 4: The Preperations

**There was a chapter that came before this, but I could not find the file. Basically, a group of Vorts almost succeeded in killing off one of the Tallest. And would have succeeded, had not Ren managed to get Kai back to the Massive in time. That's it in a nutshell **

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Invader Zim, or the characters of Mah and Ren. I do own Kai however.**

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"**Lasers."**

"**Smoke machines"**

"**Lasers"**

"**Smoke machines"**

"**Lasers"**

"**Smoke machines"**

"**Lasers"**

"**Smoke machines"**

"**Lasers"**

"**Smoke machines"**

"**Donuts."**

"**Where?" Red and Purple asked in stereo, looking around excitedly. Upon noticing that there were none, they looked at Kai. Who was lounging on a couch, reading through reports.**

"**There are no donuts." Red said accusingly.**

**Kai looked up and replied, "No, but it seemed to be the only way for you two to shut up. You've been arguing for two hours now. Two freak' in hours! It's getting annoying, aren't they getting annoying?" Kai asked a technician who had the misfortune of walking by the couch.**

"**Errr…" he started. He knew that he had to answer her, but if he agreed that would piss off the other two Tallest. On the other hand, Almighty Kai was already annoyed, if he disagreed with her, then that would tick her off even more. Either way he was going to piss off someone. The difference would be the numbers. Agreeing meant that there would be two Tallests mad at him. Disagreeing, he would be in favor with the other two, but out of favor with Kai. Which was a scary thought. The vengeance Almighty Kai rained down upon the Vort group that almost killed her was legendary. In the fact that nothing so horrible had ever been done to another living thing by an Irken since Tallest Azure's reign 5000 years ago. It almost made one feel sorry for the group. Almost.**

"**Errr…." The technician said again, feeling Tallest Red's and Purple's eyes bore into his back.**

"**Your Tallest asked a question." Red said warningly.**

"**Yeah, are we annoying?" Purple asked in the same tone of voice.**

**The technician had no choice, he swallowed hard, opened his mouth and was about to chose his doom when suddenly another voice was heard.**

"**I brought sandwiches! Are you hungry my Tallest?" Invader Ren asked with a lot of pep. She walked into the common lounge room bearing a fairly large platter of sandwiches. The technician sagged with relief as the platter became the focuse of all three Tallest's attention. Their antennas had perked up at the word "sandwiches" and soon the three were gathered around the platter, which Ren had set down on a table. The technician gave a smile of thanks to Ren and quickly left while the Tallests were still busy snacking.**

**After a few minutes, when the snacking speed had slowed down enough to where they could actually talk and understand each other, the conversation started up again.**

"**I'm telling you," Red started swallowing a bite, "Lasers."**

"**No," Purple replied, "Smoke machines."**

**Kai growled a little. The snacking had done much to diminish her annoyance and anger, but those were quickly returning again.**

"**That's it," She said outloud silencing Red's and Purple's argument. "You, Invader Ren, which is better: Lasers or smoke machines?"**

**Unlike other Irkens, Ren could actually side with a Tallest without running the risk of being shoved out an airlock by the other two. For obvious reasons of course.**

"**I personally prefer smoke machines, my Tallest." Ren replied.**

"**What?" Red exclaimed.**

"**Exactly!" Purple said.**

"**Alright then, so that's one more for smoke machines." Kai stated.**

"**But lasers are so much flashier." Red complained.**

"**But smoke machines are more dramatic, am I right?" Purple asked Ren. She nodded her agreement.**

"**Humph. That still does not settle it. That's one Irken in this ship that sides with you Purple. We'll see what the others say." Red growled and started to head out the door.**

"**Enough, Red get back here. There's a better way to settle this than shoving anyone that disagrees with you in prison." Kai said to his retreating back.**

**Red stopped and looked back at her, "I only did that once." He said. But came back anyway.**

"**Alright, this is how we settle this. I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 435. Whoever is closest, they get to decide the effects. Okay?"**

"**That seems fair," Purple replied.**

**Red nodded his agreement.**

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**I took the name of Tallest Azure from a fanfiction I read sometime ago. I do not recall the title nor the author, but still that name and character belongs to someone else **


	5. Chapter 5: Impending Doom 2 prt 1

**Disclaimer: Hehe...I own nothing in this chapter, except for Kai. I don't even own most of the lines in this story. I wrote this chapter in my pre-cal class last year, while the teacher was droning on about functions. I had no dvd or any other reference. This all came from my memory of the first episode...**

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"**Wiggle you antennae in salute, for here they are! Your all knowing, all powerful leaders, the Almighty Tallest!"**

**The cheering grew louder as the platform descended from the ceiling revealing Almighty Red, Kai, and Purple, all of whom were waving at the crowd.**

'**Please don't let them start up again' Kai thought, she didn't think she could take anymore of their arguments over special effects.**

"**See, told you they would like the lasers." Red started**

**Kai groaned silently.**

"**Everything is lasers with you," Purple replied. Kai was about to insert her own comment when she saw a stray beam coming her way.**

"**I'm telling you smoke machines are the wave of-Argh! My eye!" Purple said suddenly, dropping to the floor of the platform.**

**As Kai had ducked the laser beam to avoid getting hit herself, it instead hit Purple in the eye.**

**The crowd cheered louder at this event, thinking it was a part of the show. Kai looked at Purple and tried not to giggle at his predicament.**

"**See, Lasers." Red finished.**

**The platform completed its descent. Kai stepped forward and addressed the crowd. "Welcome mighty Irken warriors! You are the finest that the military training school has to offer. Good for you."**

**Red continued, "Standing behind us however are the invaders we have chosen for one of the most crucial roles in Operation Impending Doom Two!"**

**The screen behind the Tallest turned on and Red added "You in the audience just get to sit and watch."**

"**You should have tried harder." Purple commented, having recovered from the laser incident.**

"**These superior ones," Red started but Purple jumped and said with a smug look on his face, "Not as superior as us of course."**

**Red replied, "Duh. These less than superior than us, but still quite superior soldiers will each be assigned to an enemy planet!"**

**Kai continued facing the Invaders on the stage. "There you will blend in with the hideous, native in habitants."**

**Red jumped in, "All the while gathering crucialinformation, assessing the planet's weaknesses, making it vulnerable to our Great…Big…Spaceship…"**

**Kai and Purple looked at Red oddly while he tried hard to think up the word, "…Gang!" he said final.**

**Kai raised an eye at him and Purple said in a slightly satirical tone "You mean, the Armada?"**

**Kai shook her head and continued, "Now let the Assigning begin!"**

**There was one "Whoohoo!" from the audience, but Red ignored it and said "Step forward Invader Larg."**

**The said Invader quickly scurried up to stand in front of the Almighty Tallest.**

"**Ah, you seemed to have grown since last you stood before us soldier." Kai said.**

**Invader Larg puffed up a little at this compliment.**

"**You've been assigned to Blorch, home of the slaughtering Rat People." Purple added. As he said that a picture flashed on the screen of Larg being surrounded by the Rat people. The Invader himself was curled up in a fetal position crying.**

"**Why would you draw that?"(****1)**** Larg asked quickly, tearing a little.**

**The Tallest either didn't hear him or didn't care. Red continued, "However, because of your increase height we've decided to give you Vort. Home of the universe's most comfortable couch."**

**Another picture flashed of Invader Larg lounging on a huge, comfy looking sofa.**

"**Yes!" Larg said, happy again.**

**Almighty Kai gave him a small computer with more information on the planet, and then Invader Larg scurried off to the other end of the line.**

**Purple called out, "Next, Invader Spleen!"**

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1 Truth be noted, the Tallest had nothing to do during the two hour wait before the ceremony. In that spirit of extreme boredom, Kai thought it would be fun to have pictures of the Invaders on their planet, as well as what the tallest guessed they would be doing. Purple and Red agreed and so all three drew up pictures to stick on the screen. It was an amusing way to spend two hours.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------This is divided up into two chapters because class ended before I could finish it. So I started again the next day

Hoped you enjoyed! (2nd part of this chapter will be up in a few more days ))


	6. Chapter 5:Impending Doom 2 prt

**Ri2- Perhaps they did, perhaps they got someone to do it for them **

**Techno Doofus- Thanks, glad you are liking it : )**

**Disclaimer: Like the previous chapter, I don't own anything in this one, except for Kai and a few lines**

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**-Two hours later-**

"**Last, Invader Skoodge!" Kai called out.**

**Skoodge went and stood before the Tallests.**

"**Now that's just sad." Red commented.**

**Purple bent down and asked, "Could you get any shorter?"**

"**You will be assigned to Blorch. Home of the slaughtering Rat People" Kai replied off hand.**

**Skoodge teared at the picture of himself on the screen.**

"**Thus concludes the great assigning!" Red called out.**

"**Help yourself to some nachos, and we'll see you on the loading bay." Kai added.**

"**Yes. Gorge yourselves, you moochers." Purple commented. **

**The Tallest turned to leave, but froze in their tracks by a voice that sounded horribly familiar...**

"**Wait! WAIT!"**

"**That voice!" Red said trying to find the source.**

"**It can't be…" Purple called out as a familiar figure climbed up on the stage.**

"**Zim…" Kaihissed under her breath.**

**Zim marched up in front of them and bowed. "Sorry I'm late my Tallest, I couldn't find my invitation. You're lucky I came at all." He said.**

**Skoodge slowly backed away as Kai replied, "You weren't invited at all, Zim."**

"**Weren't you banished to Foodcourtia? Shouldn't you be frying something?" Purple asked.**

"**Oh, I quit when I heard about this." Zim answered.**

"**You quit being banished?"**

**Kai sighed and said with a bit of malice, "The assigning is over Zim."**

"B**ut you can't have an Invasion without me! I was apart of Operation Impending Doom One! Don't you remember?"**

**Ignoring the muttering and cursing of his co-leaders Purple replied "Ah, yes. We remember…"**

**-Insert flashbacks of ch: 2-**

"**I put the fires out." Zim said.**

**Red leaned in as he spoke, "You made them worse."**

"**Worse or…Better?" Zim replied smugly.**

"**Besides," Purple continued "No Invader has ever been so very small…You're very small Zim…you're a tiny…thing…"**

"**But Invader blood marches through my veins! Like giant radioactive rubber pants! The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!" Zim replied dramatically.**

**The Tallests looked at him oddly, finally Red replied, "Uh…as show of appreciation for your service in the past…Here's a sandwich."**

**Zim looked confused as he received the sandwich. Kai quickly jumped in and said out loud "Thanks for coming! Goodnight!"**

**Zim interrupted though, "Wait, WAIT!"**

**Purple looked at him, "What? You got your sandwich."**

"**My Tallest, an opportunity to prove that I can truly be an Invader, is all that I ask. Gimme!"**

**The Tallests sort of glanced at each other. "Wait a minute, I have a plan." Red muttered under his breath. **

"**We see now, that you are truly deserving." He started.**

**Catching on to the idea, Kai causally hovered behind the other two Tallest, away from view,and using her communicator, gave specific directionsto Mah, who by was working on a technical problem from behind the screen. The directions were as follow, "I don't care how you do it, but quicklymake up a planet and place it as far away from the actual operation as possible"**

**And sure enough, it was there in a matter of seconds and Red found the hastely drawn planet taped to the side of the screen. "It's right there." He replied in answer to Zim's question.**

"**A secret mission…" Zim said to himself.**

"**Happy now?" Kai asked**

"**Yes." Zim replied very much pleased.**

"**Invaders, report to the equipment hall. Oh, and don't forget…Lasers" Red said.**

"**AHHH!" Purple called out dropping to the ground again.**

**Grinning at Purple's expense Red stepped forward and said "It's only a matter of time before all the races of the universe serve the Irken Empire!"**

**-At the equipment hall-**

**Kai briefed the Invaders in the hall. "This is a standard information retrieval unit." She said indicating the robot in front of her. "Also known as a SIR. It will assist you in gathering information during your mission."**

"**It's also a thermos." Red added.**

"**Who wants this one!" Purple called out, holding up the SIR.**

"**I do!" A random Invader in the back of the room called out.**

**Purplethrew the unit at him.**

**-KLUNK!-**

"**Thank you." The random Irken said before collapsing to the ground.**

"**Everyone else, line up and take a robot." Red commanded.**

**The Invaders lined up and received their SIRs. However, when it was Zim's turn the Tallest all hesitated.**

"**Finally, a robot slave of my own." Zim replied and then stuck his arms out to receive a bot.**

**The Tallest looked at each other, and while Red and Purple moved behind Kai to access the dumpster Kai said "Umm…We have a top secret model for you Zim."**

"**Whooweeeooo" Purple said before causally throwing a unit out from behind his back.**

**Kai studied the robot as it laid in a heap on the ground. It looked pretty good seeing how it was made of junk and cobbled together in less than two minutes.**

""**It looks kind of….not good." Zim commented after the robot had not moved for a few minutes.**

"**Yes, well, That's what your enemies will think. Get it?" Purple asked.**

**Red and Kai both nodded their heads in agreement. Zim gave the robot another look smiled, and said "Yes, I see. Very good. It even fooled me. I am honored to be trusted with such advanced technology."**

**The Tallest started snickering, trying very hard not to lose it all together. The unit sprang to life.**

"**GIR reporting for duty." It said.**

"**GIR? What does the G stand for?" Zim asked.**

**GIR's eyes changed from red to cyan. "I Don't..Know…" the robot replied.**

"**WHEEEHOOO" It called out suddenly, banging its head with its hands.**

"**Ummm…Is it suppose to be stupid?" Zim asked as the robot continued yelling and banging its hands against its head.**

"**It's not stupid," Purple replied with a grin, "It's advaaanced."**

**Even while they boarded the Massive, the Tallest were still laughing about it.**

**"That shouldkeep Zim away from the operation." Kai commented.**

**Red nodded and replied,"With any luck he'll wind up in a black hole or something"**

**-6 months later-**

"**My Tallests a transmission from…Earth." A technician called out saying the last word slowly.**

"**What is Earth?" Purple asked.**

**As if to answer the screen blinked on and there was Zim. Alive and well.**

**Kai inhaled sharply in surprise at that image, though was unfortunately in the process of drinking something when she did that. Red and Purple just sat there in stunned silence, Red dropping his drink**

**"Greetings my Tallest! My mission goes well."**

**Red gathered his wits the fastest and spit out his straw. "Zim…You're...alive?" he asked over the sputtering of his fellow Tallest. He still couldn't believe what he saw.**

"**Yes, so very much alive and filled with goo…mission goo…don't be surprise if I finish the humans before the Armada even gets here. Well I have much work to do, so Invader Zim signing off…Arghhh my spine!" For Zim's robot had fallen on top of him as he ended the transmission.**

**The Tallest looked at each other with a bit of worry.**

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Reviews are appreciated : )


	7. Chapter 6: Could it get any worse?

**This chapter and all others after it take place after 'The Trial', an episode that was never made, but a script for it was. It's an awesome script and yes I am advertising it a little by saying you should read it. I don't know the exact site it's on, but I'm sure you can google it :P**

**Oh yeah...forgot to introduce them...RiKa is Ren's SIR unit, and Spiffy is a robot that's like a SIR unit. Mah made it herself...(She likes the word Spiffy and so used that for the name, for those of you who were wondering...)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Invader Zim, or Ren and Mah or RiKa and Spiffy. Kai is my creation however**

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**"It's the fairest way Kai, stop complaining." Purple commented as Ren held up the straws for the Tallests to draw from.**

**"Why are we even considering this treaty? I mean, we never even heard of these...Blorgarians...up until an hour ago." Kai asked.**

**"That's the point." Red replied.**

**"Yes. Exactly...Soooo….why are we drawing straws again?" Purple asked sheepishly.**

**Red glanced up at the ceiling for a few seconds before replying. "Don't tell me I'm the only one who sees the opportunity in this. These Blorgarians have obviously heard of us, and so to protect themselves they are propsing a treaty of sorts. What they don't know is that area of the galaxy was never marked for conquest. Sure, in a show of trust, the talks are being held on their planet, but that's even more of a bonus when you think about it..."**

**"Yes, yes, I get all that." Purple commented with a wave of his hand,"I just don't see the reason to draw straws.."**

**"Well, all of us don't need to go, especially with the operation in progress,but we have to decide on who is going. And since none of us will volunteer, this is the fairest way to decide." Kai explained, focusing on the straws. **

**"Who would want to go to some boring diplomacy thing when there are planets to be conquered?"**

**"My point exactly, so at the same time, we are going to chose one of the three straws that Ren is holding, the one holding the straw that is marked on the end, is the one that has to go. Get it?"Red asked.**

**Kai and Purple nodded, and at the same time, the three choose a straw and drew.**

**-Insert strongest Irken curse word here- Kai said, looking at her straw.**

**Purple and Red snickered. "Have fun Kai!" Purple said before they hovered off.**

**Kai frowned 'I've got to have the worst of luck' she thought...**

**-Few hours later-**

**Since the ship she would travel in would be the same size as the Scouter (1) Kai would only bring two other Irkens with her. Mah, as the technician and medic, and Invader Ren as a body guard.**

**Within a few days of travel, they arrived on Blor. "Stay with the ship Mah, Ren, come with me." Kai commanded, exiting the ship.**

**"Welcome Almighty Tallest to our humble planet." A Blorgarian said, bowing its head a little. As the race looked like walking frogs, Kai could not tell the being's gender. But were they short, the tallest ones seem to be at the most, three feet in height**

**"Well…" Kai started looking around, "I suppose this place is better than being cramped up in that ship. Let's get this over with."**

**The Blorgarian looked up and asked, "Only one of you came?"**

**Kai stared down at it and replied in a slightly icy voice, "We are sort of in the middle of something. Don't worry, I have consent of my co-leaders to do what I see fit here. We generally don't consider alliances." 'And almost never keep them.' Kai added silently to herself.**

**The Blorgarian swallowed nervously. "Of course, forgive me if I seemed intrusive. This way please." It said heading off.**

**Almighty Kai hung back for a second giving Ren a last minute command, "have your SIR unit gather data on this planet. Mah's unit will be doing the same thing from the ship, but as you are traveling with me, your unit should be able to gather more information."**

**Invader Ren nodded and relayed the command to RiKa, and followed Kai as she followed the Blorgarian…**

**-Many hours later-**

**"Well, that was a boring waste of time." Kai said as their ship left Blor's atmosphere.**

**"Actually, we managed to gather a ton of data on the planet, and you managed to convince the Blorgarians that they were allies of Irk. So it was not all that bad my Tallest." Mah replied.**

**Kai looked at her, "Yeah, well you weren't there listening to the Blorganians talk for hours on end..."**

**Ren nodded her agreement, for when the Blorgarian embassador and it's advisors talked, their voices just like grated against the brain.**

**-Next day-**

**"Okay, what is that smell?"**

**Mah turned from the controls and faced Kai. "What smell?"**

**Kai didn't reply right away, but instead threw aside the Vortian comic she was reading and got up, trying to find the source. "It's some sort snacky smell...It seems really familiar...Can't place my finger on it though...But I've been smelling it since we left the Massive...though it's stronger now..."**

**Mah took a deep whiff of air. Indeed, she could, just barely though, smell the hint of something. "Maybe Ren is making something in the kitchen?" (2)**

**"I'm right here." Ren replied from her position next to Mah.**

**"Oh yeah...you were helping me check the computer system..." Mah said.**

**"Besides, this ship doesn't even have a kitch-My Tallest? Where are you going?" Ren asked.**

**"To see where the smell is coming from..." Kai said as she left to wander around. 'Where is it coming from?' Kai thought. It had grown stronger as time progressed and now had that overcooked sort of smell to it.**

**"I smell it too now..." Ren replied getting up to also see where it came from. Mah followed her, for she could smell it really good now. Like something was burning...badly. They found Tallest Kai with her face near a vent. **

**"Where's this thing lead to?" she asked.**

**Mah studied it for a few seconds before replying "It's a conduct to the engine, I don't see-" She was interupted by a sudden sound. Like the cracking of something short circuiting...**

**"Uh-oh." Mah managed to get out before the ship gave a mighty shuttered and started accelerating out of control...**

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**"MAH! Start up the boosters!"**

**"Why! We're crashing anyway!"**

**"Make the crash smoother!" Ren and Tallest Kai shouted at the same time.**

**Mah nodded and did what she could. RiKa was attached to Ren, as was Kai.**

**"Protect your Tallest!"**

**"I'll do what I can!"**

**Mah then latched herself onto Ren, along with Spiffy. They braced for the impact. Kai couldn't help but notice that the planet they were accelerating towards looked remarkably like a giant tasty yaeling berry (3)...**

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"What the–?" the boy was interrupted by a loud crash, he turned to look and then just shrugged and got back to staring at the grass. It was just a newly formed,non-descript giant dirt hill behind him. Nothing special there...** **

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(4)**

**"Ugh! It's all...dirt!"**

**"Shut up! We need to stay discreet...to cover for that crash or something."Ren snapped to Mah.**

**Kai was already at a bush, peeking over it at the strange creatures.**

**"They're so...ugly..."**

**"RiKa, join with Spiffy and scan the planet. We need disguises and general information about this place."**

**The SIR units nodded and went straight to work. The two Irkens observed as Mah worked with the two SIR units.**

**"Hey...there's more Irken equipment here..."**

**"But...I don't recall this planet on the list..."**

**Kai looked through her clipboard and none of her scribbles looked like theyaelin berryshe saw from space.**

**"I'd remember such a yummy looking planet..."**

**"Hey...there's another Irken biosignature..." Mah reported, pointing to the combined SIRs.**

**Spiffy brought up a hologram, showing the basic structure of the Irken in a green hue. All three looked towards it, as it looked familiar...the shape...the height...So horribly familiar..**

**Kai's eyes were slowly growing wider. 'There's no freakin way...there's like billions of planets, there's no way that I'm on the same one with-'**

**"COME BACK YOU ALIEN SCUM!"**

**"Nonsense! I am huMAN!"**

**"I'll expose you, ZIM!"**

**Two boys passed the 'hidden' group of Irkens at amazing speed. The three sat wide-eyed in silence for a few seconds. Kai was the first to speak.**

**"Why? Why of all places? ANYPLACE but here!"**

**"Here. The SIRs have found suitable disguises for us, and have found a base for us to operate. My Tallest, with any luck, we can repair the ship and get out before he notices us." Rensaid tryingto calm Kai down...**

**"Repair? We have to STAY here?" Kai washorriedfied at the thought and went over to the ship, to where Mah was examining the ship's engine and power core,**

**"What the Irk is this?" Mah wondered outloud. She carefully pulled out some burnt,blackish-purplish stuff. It looked to be a sort of packaging of something or another...Sensing her leaders presence behind her, the tall technician turned saying, "This was stuff seemed to have caused some sort of reaction to the pow-" she paused as she notice Kai's experssion. It was directed at the burnt stuff in the compartment andit went from recognization to anger. "Purple is going to pay for this...Dearly..."**

**Mah and Ren looked at each other, confused, andthen shrugged a bit.**

**--**

**Hidden in the night, the three worked to load the ship and themselves into an old home. Once inside they created an underground base, as usual for Invaders. Ren helped with this, being trained in how to work a base. Inside they were given a place to put on a well-made disguise. They also were taught about school and the process of a normal human day. Kai was about "high skool" height, or age, and Ren was about "elementary" "age". None of this made sense, but it was just temporary anyway.**

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**(1) **This was a reference to ch:3. The chapter that I apparently lost somehow...Basically, the ship that they are using is a small flagship. The same size of the ship that you would have been introduced to in chapter three. The ship can only hold about 6ish Irkens comfortably, and even less than if a Tallest happens to be riding in the ship.

**(2)** Hasn't really been introduced alot in the stories, but will later on. Ren happens to be a really good cook, and occasionally makes food for the Tallest. In RL, Rai is a much better cook then myself, and I think she's better than Link. Anyhow, just a little inside humor for us three. (To explain it would take a while and many stories, mainly of my failings, in a kitchen...and Rai, if you are reading this, I did not blow up the microwave freshman year...it merely short circuited...)

**(3)** Another reference to a conversation I had. I was asked what Kai's first imperssion of Earth from space would be, and I said that she would probably think of it as a giant, tasty, blue berry. So that was added in. Except I made up the name Yaelin berry cause blue berries didn't seem like an Irken snack item...

**(4)** This part of the story is actually an excerpt from Rai's chapter. I did some minor editing to it, but the brilliance is her's. (It actually starts at the little boy part in the park...)

**Anyhow, we decided to change the setting for a few chapters, for we wanted a change in pace **

**I'm not going to explain what their human disguises look like. For one thing, it would be hard to do (for me at least) for another thing, I have a picture of them on photobucket. I just don't know if I'm allowed to post the link for it on here...anyone care to tell me? It would be apperciated, and the pictures are really good. The ones of Ren and Kai are edited screen shots from the show. The ones of Mah (There isn't an Irken in the show that's a foot shorter of the Tallest.) and the three's human forms, but Link drew herself. (Good artist...takes her about 40 seconds or less to whip out a drawing. I timed her for Kai's disguise and it took her about 35ish seconds. The great part about it, is that they are really good and she never erases for she never draws in pencil. How crazy is that?) Though I am going to say that I came up with Kai's outfit. I'm so proud of my self -gives self a pat on the back-**

**Hope you are enjoying reading this. I'm not too sure when I'll get the next chapter up...so you'll just have to guess at why Kai is suddenly ticked off at Purple **

**R&R if you want, it makes me happy knowing people are reading this : D**


	8. Ch 7: It sort of did

Techno Doofus: Yeah, it's going to get a tad bit worse for her though :P But the stay on earth isn't indefinite : )

Ri2: Perhaps typing in the address would work? I'll look into though, wouldn't be surprised if I copied the link down wrong or something. I would describe them if I know that wouldn't make it all complicated and confusing. Which I probably would end up doing...hmm...if for some reason all else fails, then the next set of chapters I'll try to make a side note of descriptions.

As for Purple...well...you'll get the whole story in this chapter, so I won't say anything here : D

The frog people...don't really know...most likely...just look at how the alliance between Vort and Irk went.But really, the main reason forbringing in the Blorgarians, was just a way for me to have allthe characters inthe same place away from the Massive so that they could crash on earth.My friends and I had a few ideas we wanted to write out, and my friend had alreadywritten out the nifty crash scene in her chapter. So I did a short piece with the whole treaty thing. I may use the treaty thing later on...not sure

No offense taken : )And I'm sure Kai would agree with you. She would probably prefer to have crashed on someunknown planet. And that may happen later on.

Tallest Kai: WHAT?

ignores charrie But there were a few plots we wantedto write out that in order to work,the charactes needed to be on Earth. And that's the reason : D

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Invader Zim, Mah, Ren and their robots. Only Tallest Kai is mine.

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The teacher whistled a happy little tune as she rearranged things at her desk, and then looked up at the class. "Hello students! Allow me to introduce the newest member to our little government induced family." Ms. Perky (1)said, indicating to the figure lingering by the door to join her in front of the class.

The students watched with little interest as the slightly tallish girl slowly made her way to the teacher.

"Her name is...T.K. T.K. would you like to introduce yourself?" Ms. Perky asked.

Tallest Kai (a.k.a TK) glared at the class. In order to keep their prescence here a secret, Kai would have to blend in somewhat. That meant coming up with some form of greeting.

"I'm new here." she stated.

Ms. Perky waited a bit to see if more was forth coming, but T.K. remained silent. The teacher cleared her throat and asked, "Is there anything else you want to add to that?"

"No."

"Come on, don't be shy."

Kai turned to glare at the teacher and said, "Anything else I might have to say does not concern you."

Ms. Perky, being the type of teacher that she was, remained oblivious to the bitterness and distaste that emanated from the new kid, and thought '_She is probably just nervous_.'

"Okay then, choose a seat and class will begin."

Kai choose the back corner seat, the furthest one away from the teacher and the rest of the class. Originally, only Ren was going to have to go to the skool, because it seemed earthlings her height were required to go. But after staying at the base all day in extreme boredom, Kai figured it would a least be something to pass the time...but that didn't mean she had to enjoy it in the least...

'_I'm a leader of the mighty Irken Empire, I should not have to suffer these indignities! Oh, how Purple will pay..._' Kai silently vowed. She desperately hoped that Mah was well on the way with the repairs, she wanted off this stupid rock as soon as possible. For the longer they stayed the more likely that Zim would notice them. Kai shuddered at the thought. Something being placed on the desk brought her back to the present moment.

"What's this?" she demanded of the child that was passing them out.

He looked at her oddly and replied, "It's a worksheet." before walking off.

She glanced at the paper, it was titled "Major Events in History!"

"I'm not doing this." Kai said to herself, knocking the paper to the floor and dropping her head on the desk. She despised paper work, and could really care less about the history of the stupidplanet.

A little while later she heard someone stop by her desk, but ignored them.

"T.K, your paper is on the floor." The teacher said.

"Really? I didn't know." Kai replied her voiced muffled by the desk.

The bell rang, "Well, it seems that it is lunch time, you can take it home and turn it in tomorrow" The teacher said happily. Kai lifted her head and glared at the teacher, she had no intention of doing this assignment. '_Wait a minute, did she say lunch?_' Kai thought suddenly seeing a flicker of hope in this horrible day. Kai got up and slowly followed the other children to the food court area. Which turned out to be loud and filthy, and the Irken leader was hesistant to consider the slop on the tray as food.

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but Purple's cooking is probably better..." Kai muttered to herself and pokeing the gruely stuff on the tray with one of the flimsy untensils.

"My Ta-" Ren started, when she found Kai in the cafeteria, but the Tallest shushed her. Oblivious as he was to things, even Zim would realize who they were if Ren adressed her that way while in public.

"Not here. I'm T.K."

"Alright, My Ta-T-...T-..." She was almost in pain. "T.K."

Kai nodded and continued to scruntinize the food. "Think it's edible?" She wondered outloud to Ren.

"I really don't know, my T.K." Ren replied, she noticed her leader's face which clearly said 'Well then, find out.'

Ren gulped, and Kai watched as the soldier slowly ate a bit of the food. "Yeah..." Kai replied slowly, as Ren soon went into convulsions on the floor, "I think I'll avoid the food here..."

A few seconds later, Ren, who had ended up on another table during her painful reaction to the food, came running back to where Kai sat and exclaimed: "My T.K! I have a solution!We can just bring food from the home base. Other kids here do it. We can remain normal that way!"

Kai nodded, That would have been an excellent idea, but the problem was that there was nothing to bring from base...

The rest of the day passed on, and due to the growlings in her stomach, Kai was in a somewhat foul mood.

While waiting for Ren in front of the Skool, under the overhang, drops of water started to fall from sky. '_Now what?_' Kai thought annoyed.

"Look it's raining!" some dirt child yelled running out into it.

"Rain?" Kai asked herself quietly, she wondered if it was dangerous.

"My Ta..T.K. Sorry I'm late, the teacher drone held up the class because of the big headed boy."

"Huh?"

Ren shrugged, "It's this child in the class, he has a really huge head...my T.K?"

"Hmm? Oh, I was just wondering if this...rain... was dangerous some how. These humans don't seem to mind it much..." Kai let her sentence hang as a fresh new batch of human filth ran by the two Irkens, among them was a green skinned one. 'How ever did Zim pass the final test to even earn the Invader class? It's vexing.' Kai thought.

"He does not seem to be affected by it," Ren observed.

Kai nodded absent-mindedly, that was true...but still...

"You're the soldier." Kai said, before causally giving Ren a shove out into the rain.

Nothing seemed to happen at first, but then Ren started smoking, "It burns!" she said as she dove back under the covering.

"Indeed." Kai looked around, everyone else was almost gone, it wouldn't seem...normal...for them to stay after school for so long while waiting for this...rain...to let up. Already, they were getting curious stares from a few.

Kai looked out again, and notice a few of the earth monkeys were carrying strange black things over their heads, it seemed to be repelling the water away from them. '_We need one of those things..._' Kai thought, she looked behind her and notice a small human about to open one.

Without really a second though, she took it from the human, and when he tried to get it grab it back, he backed away when she glared at him.

"Lets go." She stated, after managing to open up the contraption. They took a round about way back to the base, to ensure that they weren't being followed.

Entering the base, Kai threw the rain repellent thing in a corner.

"I hate this planet." She stated, and after making sure that the windows were closed, deactivated her hologram disguise and stretched.

"I understand what you mean." Ren replied deactivating her hologram as well.

"Now, to have a talk with…Mah?" Kai started, walking into the kitchen area. She looked at the table which was covered with various cans.

"What's this?" Kai asked.

"My Tallest! I didn't hear you come in, I went to the food place..."

"Pickled onions?" Red asked slowly reading a can label.

"And bought a lot of stuff, I don't know exactly what they are, but we need snacks." Mah continued, spooning out a mouthful from a can.

"Wait!" Kai and Ren started, but Mah already shoved it into her mouth, only to start gagging a few seconds later.

"Yuck!" Mah exclaimed, spitting and wiping at her tongue, trying to get rid of the taste.

"I don't think that there is much here that is edible." Ren said

"Mah, how much longer will it take you to fix the ship?" Kai asked.

Mah thought about it for a moment, "I don't know. Those thingsin the engine short circuited a lot of things. As well as damaged the power core, it may need to be replaced. It's a wonder that we ever made it to Blor without any problems…My tallest?" Mah hesitated a bit before going on, she could practically feel the growing rage and emanating from her leader. "We may be stuck here for a while…"

Kai had clenched her fingers and she glared at Mah, and then looked down at Ren, who gulped quietly to herself. Kai looked up at the ceiling and closed her eyes, taking in a deep breathe and trying to get a hold of herself. Mah and Ren were stuck here...

'_After all, I'm an Almighty Tallest, I can deal with these situations with out losing my cool..._' Kai thought. Breathing out again, she looked back at Mah and asked, "Long distance communications?"

Mah nodded, "Those are online my Tallest."

"Is it secured?"

"Yes, Zim should not be able to pick it up. Neither should anyone else except the Massive."

"Good…I need to yell at Almighty Purple for a while." Actually, she wanted to demand the Armada send someone over to pick them up, but Kai knew that would not really be possible. They were in one of the more difficult quadrants to conquer and needed all the ships (2) But she needed to report in what had happened, and hopefully yelling at Purple would do some good for her.

Mah and Ren both had strange looks on their faces as Kai made her way over to the huge screen that took up a great deal of a wall. After hitting few buttons, the panel flipped over to reveal a different set of buttons and controls. Kai entered a few codes and the "Please Wait" scene flashed on as the transmission went through to the Massive.

'This should be interesting...' Mah though looking on, but also moving away from the Tallest at the same time. Despite the fact thatMah herself couldn't really indentify the remains of whatever screwed up the power core, Kai had been able to, by merely taking one look at one of the lesser charred pieces. As far out as it sounded to the tall technician, Mah had to agree. The scent they all smelled on the ship did support it. And probably no one was a bigger expert on the subject than the Tallest themselves...

"What is it now Zi-Kai?" Red asked, his expression switching from annoyance to surprise.

"Hey! I thought you said the Transmission was coming from earth!" Purple yelled to someone off screen.

"It is sirs." The technician replied.

Red and Purple looked back at Kai. '_She seems really pissed off about something_.'Red thought.

"Uhhh…I thought you were on your way back from Blor?"Purple asked.

"Indeed, I was. But due to the stupidity of a certain Irken, we had some technical difficulties and had to crash land on this horrible little rock."

"Zim." Red muttered.

"Oh no. For once it was not Zim related…" Kai started, and from a pocket in her robe whipped out a burnt,and almostunrecognizable snack packet. "This andabout a dozenothers are what cause it."

"Hey! Those are mine!" Purple exclaimed.

"I know. I know...I am just curious to find out WHAT THE HELL THEY WERE DOING IN MY SHIP'S ENGINE!" Kai yelled back, waving the snack at him threateningly.

Purple sort of shrank back from Kai's outrage, "But they've been missing for days now…" He started at the same time that Red said, "So that's where I hid them."

The technicians onboard the Massive and the two Irkens with Kai looked on curiously. Those nearest to the Tallests sort of stepped back from their stations. It was always interesting to watch the Tallest fight and argue, as long as one was watching it from a safe distance...

"What?" Kai asked, turning to glare at Red

"Excuse me?" Purple asked at the same time.

Red continued, seemingly oblivious to the fact that he was being targeted by his co-leaders. "All this time they were there. No wonder I couldn't find them, you had already left for Blor. And to think I set off the emergency alarm to clear half the ship so that I could search for them. Such a waste of time..."

"Wait a minute, that was you? I was in the middle of some very important inventory wor—" (3)

-Crunch-

Purple stopped at the loud noise, Kai had clenched her fingers so tightly around the bag that she had crushed the burnt snacks. She was still glaring at Red.

"Uhhh…" Red started, noticing exactly how mad Kai was. Her left antenna kept twitching and her eyes seemed to glow. "Think of it as a vacation?" he finished.

"Oh. A vacation?" Kai said through clenched teeth. "I'm stuck on this wretched dirt ball for who knows how long, having to blend in with the stupid inhabitants. The only things that seem to be edible are these stupid burnt snacks. And not only is Zim on the same planet, he is a mere few miles away. Yes. This is a wonderful change of pace from being on the Massive. Did I forget to mention that there's no snakcs in this wretched place?"

"Well, you know, that's not entirely true. Those snacks are good no matter how over-cooked they are." Red replied and then suddenly he thought of something, "Hey! If she isstuck there,who is going to do her share of the work here?"

"I don't think now's the time..." Purple said slowly, though it was a good question. He was not about to let Red dump that on him. He looked back at Kai and almost gulped. Her eyes were definitely glowing and she looked ready to kill something. '_She's going to lose it_.' Red thought as Kai opened her mouth, but he almost fell down when insteadgoing into an angery tirade,she simply stated, "I'm going to sleep now." And without another word, hovered over and flopped, unceremoniously, faced down on some conveniently placed couch.

Face buried into a cushion, Kai blocked out the conversation between Red and Purple and Mah and Ren. She tried to think clearly through her situation. Shoving aside all the frustration and anger that came with having to go to the diplomacy thing, Red's stupidity, and crashing on this planet, she went through the situations.

One of the larger issues were scarcity of snacks... '_It will be like training for a soldier all over again…Irkens really don't need food to live…I can deal without going off the wall…I think…'_

The next larger problem was Zim. No matter how Kai looked at it, there was not really a good side or a solution. '_Okay then…we'll just have to be sure he does not notice us…Though he has a horrible habit of finding out things that he should not. And if he does…well…he's not trained as a technician so that gives me plenty of reasons to keep him as far away as possible from my ship. And neither I nor Ren and Mah, can really be involved in his "mission" on Earth, because that is not the Invader way…yeah…that works as an excuse…so besides for presenting a major annoyance, and possibalylife threatening,Zim is nothing to worry about….'_

Kai sort of jerked at the sound of Mah and Ren cutting the transmission with the other two tallest. She had not been aware that she had actually fallen asleep, but her limbs felt heavy and so did her eyes. She felt too lazy to move from her current position and so just half listened to Ren's and Mah's conversation.

"Did we wake her up?"

"Does not look like it"

"That's good...where are you going?"

"Back to the food place. Hopefully with RiKa's help I'll find something remotely edible. Or at least find things to make something to eat."

"Hopefully you'll have better luck than me. Oh, here. This is the monies that they use to get stuff."

"Where did you get it?"

"Spiffy found it…" (4)

Kai at this point had drifted back to sleep, diverging from examining various ways to deal with the current issues into a dream of sorts in which she shrunk Red and used him as the ball for ping-pong...It was a happy thought...

* * *

(1) First idea for a teacher. An insanely optimistic one. A contrast to Ms. Bitters. Hence the name.

(2) I'm aslight sucker for details. It would seem to me that had aTallest actually gotten stranded somewhere, the Armada probably would have done their best to get to their leader(s) This was just a lame, but effective way of avoiding this technicality : )

(3)'Very important inventory work'- A running joke. Basically means, he was sorting through all the snacks they had in the pods, trying to hoard the best ones for himself.

(4) A reference to the chapter Link wrote before I wrote out this one.A funny short ficlet in which Mah and Spiffy go to the supermarket. Chaos of course ensures, when Mah realizes that the earthlings have a different type of 'monies' than she currently has. She orders Spiffy (5)to get some...

(5) Completely forgot to write out how the robots are disguised. RiKa is a slightly large, black squirrel. An evil looking squirrel, but a normal looking one as well. Spiffy's disguise, however, isa teddy bear...a walking, sharp tool carrying teddy bear...at least if Mah isn't holding it, then it looks like your average tedday bear...with a tool...Anyhow...

Hope you enjoyed this chapter. I had a bit more free time then I thought I would and so was able to place it up.

R&R


	9. Ch:8 Between Waffles

Sorry for it being so long in updating this story...sort of forgot that I had one up here. Until someone asked me about it over aim...and then they whacked me with a digital waffle when they found out the reason why I haven't updated...Anyhow, on the threat of being pummeled again with a breakfast item, I promise to have the next two chapters up by this weekend : D

Invader Iza: Glad you like it : )

Ri2: Glad the link works, I added Mah and the human disguise of Ren to it. Not sure if you saw them, but for some dumb reason or another, I completely forgot to paste them into the picture. Anyhow...yes it's so much fun to have them trapped on earth, though I'm sorry to say it's only for two more chapters.

T.K: And then I get to carry out my revenge...MUHAHAHAHAHA!

Me: And then you get to wait in limbo until I get around to working out some basic details of a few plots I have thought of.

T.K:...

Disclaimer: I do not own and IZ characters or Ren, RiKa, Spiffy, and Mah. Or pocky, or cheeze-its. I do own Kai though.

* * *

Almighty Kai woke up to the smell of something. It was not a wonderful smell or even a horrible one. It was just…foreign. Curious as to what it could be, Kai got up from the chair and stretched. The earthen chair was alright she supposed, but Kai still preferred to use the one that some how survived the crash. For it was, after all, custom built for her body structure. But it was also in the underground base, and with Mah pounding around and causing various things to explode and sizzle, well...Kai really didn't want to be sleeping down there... 

Entering into the kitchen, she stopped and studied the items on the table.

"What's that?"

"Waffles, my Tallest." Ren replied.

"Uh-huh…"

"It's one of the foods I've found that didn't seem to have any sort of compound that would sicken us."

"Uh-huh…"

"I also got something called Pocky that doesn't seem to need any special preparation, and another thing called Cheeze-its, and this other crackery thing that seems to be like the first except it's more of a brownish color than orange."

"Really?"

"Yeah, and these other things…" Ren continued, and for a few minutes started to list and explain the various food items she found. In truth, Kai had stopped paying attention after the first sentence. Something that became apparent when in the middle of Ren's explaining she interrupted with "So. These…Waffles…edible?"

"Yes…" Ren said slowly, "Mah had someyesterday and todayand sheis still alive and walking around."

"Okay…" Kai said, sitting down. She tore off a small bit of the food and placed it into her mouth, chewing slowly. After about a minute, she swallowed. There was a stretch of silence as Ren nervously waited for a reaction.

"Kind of bland, but they're okay I suppose."

Ren breathed a sigh of relief and busied herself with darting around the house, preparing for another horrible day at skool, while Kai ate waffles.

Finishing, Kai sat there and wondered what she was going to do today; she started to think that being here bored was better than being in that educational plug; when the sound of something ringing caught her attention. RiKa held up the device for her.

"…" Kaiwas a bit unsure as she held it up to her ear. Ren had a few days ago,explained the concept of a phone, but Kai had been too busy fuming at Purple at the time to pay attention.

"Yes?" She asked

"Is the mother of T.K. there?" asked the voice of Ms. Perky

"Mother?" Kai asked herself, all the while frowning at the thought of that teacher knowing how to contact this dwelling.

A screen popped out of RiKa's head and showed a picture of Mah in disguise.

"Hello? You still there?"

"Uh, yes. Mah is working." Kai replied. (1)

"Oh. Is this T.K. I'm speaking to?"

"Errr…yes?"

"So you are better and coming to skool today? Because if you don't the truancy squad at the skool is going to come over to your house and ask a ton of questions to the other house occupants to see if there is a good reason for you to be missing so many days out of your education. I realize you've probably been sick, but you sound well now, so I'll expect to see you today, good-bye!" Ms. Perky had said all of this in one quick sentence and in her typical up-beat manner. Muttering a string of curses, Kai handed RiKa the phone back and made her way to the front door, activating her disguise along the way.

The day at skool went much like the first time Kai was here. Though there was some entertainment at lunch as Zim made a spectacle of being normal. He even had some dance number this time. 'It still eludes me as to how he passed that test.' Kai thought, while eating another waffle for lunch.

As the afternoon progressed in the classroom, Kai spaced out like normal. She had years and years of experience in that matter. However, an hour or so before the day normally ended, the sound of all the dirt children exiting the classroom snapped Kai back into attention. She hoped that meant that skool was ending early, but it was not so as Ms. Perky explained it to her. Apparently, to get use to their lives of working for a faceless corporation, it was decided that the students in Ms. Perky's class would spend the last hour and a half as an aide to another teacher, janitor, or lunch lady. As the students chose the person they would aide for during the time that Kai decided to miss skool, there was only one teacher left. The one that no one wanted. (2)

As Kai opened the door to the classroom where this teacher was, she stopped and stared at the kid who sat next to the door. It was not a kid at all, but Zim. 'Oh. Of course. There's what? A hundred or so classroom in this facility? It only seems natural that I get the one that Zim is in.' Kai thought, trying not to let her distaste show. She scanned the rest of the class and noticed Ren in the back. They shared a brief glance, and then Ren got back to doing whatever it was she was doing and Kai finished her scan of the class. Which was abruptly stopped when a shadow suddenly appeared out of no where in front of her.

"You must be T.K. That's your seat." The figure stated pointing to a desk that sat to the left of the bigger desk. 'Great. I have to sit in facing the lot of them.' Kai thought sitting down. Ms. Bitters sat back down at her desk, and the class took no more interest in Kai. Apparently the reason for her being here had been explained. She sighed and looked out the window. Her mind wondered around as she thought of various ways to get back at Red. Kai was sure she could convince Purple to help her, she just needed to think up a plan.

After a while her mind was stuck on sending Red on some fake diplomacy thing to the planet Zythe. She knew it would never work. For one thing, Red would never go to a diplomacy meeting. And he was not as gullible as Purple was. For at the sight of the planet, even if Kai gave him a false name, Red would recognize it as Zythe, and would turn back. The last reason why she wasn't really considering it was because Kai thought sending him unprepared to Zythe was a bit over the edge.

(3) Zythe was one of the few planets that the Tallests were hesitant about sending Irkens to, they even thought about removing it completely from the list for Impending Doom III. But that would look bad for the Empire, so Zythe was placed on the list, but the Tallest planned on going about its invasion in a different manner. The planet itself was not bad, from what Kai could tell from the pictures they had of it, it possessed some interesting landscape. The race on the planet could be easily handled by a some what experienced Invader. No, the problem was the creatures that lived in certain places there. When spybots had been sent there, they stopped working after only a few hours. From what the technicians could tell from the data they managed to get, the energy had been taken from the bots. Later, a small team of three Irkens had been assembled to retrieve the bots, but they never came back. When a slightly larger team of soldiers had been sent, only one of them survived long enough to send a secure transmission back to the Massive. From what could be told there was some sort of species there that fed on energy. They had some how latched unknowingly onto the paks of the Irkens sent there and over time sucked the paks dry of any energy. How the creatures did that without alerting the Irken was unknown. What the creature looked like, where they came from, how big they were was unknown. Everything about these creatures was unknown. The only known thing was the fact that they absorbed energy, and managed to feed off of the pak without alerting the owner. Which was definitely a threat. Luckily, the only ones who know about those creatures and were still living, were the Tallests themselves, and the control brain. Which was good, for it would not do for word of these creatures to get out to the general public. All evidence that the Irkens had even visited the planet had been destroyed, including the stuff on the planet itself.

Kai cringed slightly, partly because of the thought of some unknown thing sucking the life out of her pak, but mostly because of a stale, foul smelling wind that kept blowing against the right side of her face. Waving it away with one hand, she wondered some more about what those creatures could possibly look like when she heard a growl. She turned and came face-to-face to a snarling, shadowy visage with white, reflective eyes.

"AHHH!" Kai yelled, leaping back towards the windows.She had almost brought her spider legs to bear befor it dawned on her that she was still in the skool room and the growling shadow was in fact, Ms. Bitters. In the back of the class, Ren settled back down in her seat. She had been busy sleeping when she heard Kai's yell, and well Ren was glad that no one had seemed to notice that she had lept on her desk, ready to jump in and defend her leader.

"What?" Kai asked, as her heart rate slowed and the robotic legs in her pak settled back down.She went back to her desk...more than a bit annoyed at herself for having been startled so easily.

Ms. Bitters pointed to the desk. Kai was surprise to find that amidst the time she had spaced out, piles of paper had appear on her desk.

"Grade them."

"Grade them?"

"If they pass place them in this box with a 'P' If they fail, as I'm sure a lot of them will, place them in this box with 'F'."

Ms. Bitters left Kai to her task and went on lecturing the class on the various ways the world would end. Kai looked at the stack of papers, 'That's easy enough.' And with that thought, Kai shoved all the papers into the 'F' box.

* * *

(1) hehe...when Link chose the name for her character, we never realized how well it worked. It's pronounced 'Ma' . We didn't realize the implications of that until we decided on what roles the characters would play on Earth, and decided that since Mah did need to stay at the base to repair the ship, she should be the parent. And then we cracked up because her name fitted so well with her role. 

(2) The reason I had it so that Kai was a student aide for Ms. Bitters was so that Rai could use my character if she wanted to in her chapter.

(3) A fluff paragraph. The whole thing was to set the mood so that Kai would have a reason to freak out when she saw the lurking shadow of Ms. Bitters right next to her face. It may serve the purpose of a foreshadowing of a future chapter. Who knows, I'll probably end up using the planet again later on. Haven't really thought that far ahead.

After this chapter, I only have about 3 more made. You see, Link stopped writing her chapters after the grocery story. She prefers drawing up comics to writing. Rai stopped writing her chapters after the three leave earth. Her last chapter she has written is only half-way done. She seems to have lost interest at the moment in the writing of the fics. I enjoy writing, (it gives me something to do while my professors drone on about one thing or another) but since we don't really bounce around ideas for plots anymore, I've sort of stopped after I wrote 'Kai's Revenge.' Anyhow, sob story aside, hope you have enjoyed this chapter : )

Reviews are appreciated : P


	10. ch 9: They come from where?

Invader Iza- Really? I have heard that about Spork as well (though some say that hewas green.)and also the part of Miyuki being green. But I've never heard of the one eye thing, that is very interesting. But we shall never truely know, for that episode was never made. Which makes me sad, because from the script, 'The Trial' seemed like an awesome episode. The part with little Timmy cracks me up. hands Iza some digital waffles Just don't whack me with them. I get enough of that from my cousin : P

Ri2: Yes, her hair is insanely long, isn't it? But then again, you are talking about the same character who decided to disguise her robot as a teddy bear, who on occasion walks around with a small knife. (It's actually a tool, but it looks knife-like) I'm going to have to ask Link to draw up Spiffy and add it to that picture. He looks pretty freaky : P

Who doesn't like waffles?

Ms. Bitters is awesome, though I agree with the terrifying part. She defies the rules ofgravity and physicsalmost everytime that she moves. How much cooler can you get?

Disclaimer: The only character I own is Tallest Kai and Ms. Perky now that I think about it. But I don't really care if someone steals her...sees incoming ruler Uh-oh...

* * *

"The female ate her smeet?" Kai yelled suddenly(1) jerking up in her chair. As was a habit of hers, she had zoned out the minute she walked into the horrible classroom. As such, she completely missed out on the fact that the class was watching videos on various human system. Kai's growling stomach had brought her back from the deep recess of her mind, just in time for her to look up and see current image cast upon the screen. That of a grown female with a much smaller human in her stomach. 

The movie continued playing, but Ms. Perky and the rest of the class looked in confusion at T.K. Who instantly realized her mistake in choice of words.

"What?" A random student asked outloud.

Without any hesitation, Kai replied matter-of-factly:"I said, 'the female ate her meat?'"

"Oh. I thought you said something else."

"What's so surprising about her eating meat?" Ms. Perky asked, hoping to get T.K. to talk some more. This was the first time she contributed something to class. And while it was interuppting the video and the other students weren't paying attention, Ms. Perky took the chance anyway.

Mind racing Kai replied, "Oh, I thought it wasn't good for the female to do that in her..." Kai searched for some word to add "Condition." She said finally.

"That has some truth to it. Eating too much meat is not good during the later periods of pregnancy...Now back to the video, the beautifullest (2) part is coming up. Witness the mircale as the baby makes it way into the world..."

30 minutes later

"Ugh.." Kai slammed her head repeatedly on the lunch table in an effort to banish the memories of the last 30 minutes of that...video. She was still trying to surpress the urge to gag.

"My T.K? Are you alright"

"No...I think I'm going back to the base after lunch. I don't feel well"

"What?" Ren looked worriedly at her leader and wondered if she would have to call up RiKa or Mah for assistance.

As if reading her mind Kai said, "No, you don't need to. It would look a bit too suspicious. Besides, it's not that. It's just...after the lunch period is over, the class is suppose to watch some video related to everything with human digestion. And I really do not want to watch that..."

"Oh. Okay then." Ren said, still worried.

After lunch, Kai stealthly crept outside. 'Soon I'll be back at the base and hopefully be able to forget that...video.' Kai shivered at the thought and started on her way.

-two hours later-

Kai shut the door behind her and more or less collasped on the floor of their base. What was wrong with these people? Almighty Kai had severely uderestimated, something she rarely did with anything, the security measures of that skool. It could have qualified for a moderately hard Irken training ground, with all the mines and what not. Who would have guessed that the humans would place up some many measures to make sure theirsmeets would not miss out on having their minds erased? Kai had a difficult time herself escaping, a fact that was proven by the condition of her uniform. "My Tallest?" Mah asked, as she made her way through the kitchen door.

Kai pulled herself upright and asked, "Is there a way for you to clean and repair these?"indicating her uniform.

"Err..yeah. On the lower level, this way."

Kai started to follow, but stopped when she saw into the main room.

"Why is there a large hole in front of the t.v?"

Mah grinned back at her as she opened the fridge entrance into their base. "Oh, I'm building something to make the house seem more human"

"Uh-huh." Kai said slowly as they rode the elevator down into the base.

Entering into a smallish room that served as Kai's personal chambers, Mah proceeded to help her leader remove the uniform. (3)  
"These are all scratched up and what is this sticky black stuff?" Mahasked as she unclasped the arm guards.

"Yeah, there was this flying buzz-saw thing that I managed to knock away, but then I had to dive to avoid it when it came back again. Turns out I dove into a tar pit." came the off-handed reply.

Mah stood back for a second, confused, and asked "What exactly were you doing my Tallest? If you don't mind me asking"

"I was going across skool grounds. Before 3:10 pm"

"Oh." With Spiffy's help, Mah carried the uniform out of the room.

'That thing is such a pain to put on and take off' Kai thought as she flopped into a chair. She felt strange wearing only the dark colored pants she wore under her robe and her armored back brace.

-two hours later-

'Surely it didn't take this long' Kai thought, throwing aside thecomic she was reading and exiting her room.It was clear from the quietness, thatMah wasn't down here. Kai made her way up to the ground floor.

"Mah, where's my unif-" Kai stopped and stared at the space in front of the t.v again. "Why is the hole filled with boiling water?"

"It's not water. I know how that stuff seems to burn us here. It's a different liquid. And that's jets in it, it's not boiling." Mah replied.

"Why is it there?" Kai asked again.

"It's called a hot tube. The t.v said that everyone had one. We didn't, so to make us better blend in, I built one."

Kai shooked her head, and made her way over the 'hot tube' 'She'd better be working on the ship while she's watching earth's broadcast and building useless things.' Kai thought.

Outloud she said, "Where's my uniform"

"Uh...It still is in the process of getting cleaned, my Tallest." Mah replied, for that was true, it was just that she got side tracked with finishing the hot tube that she sort of forgot to do that. "Repairs took a bit longer than expected." Mah added.

Kai looked suspiciously at Mah for a few seconds. Her gaze then dipped down to Ren, who was apparently talking to Mah before Kai entered the scene. The soldier was looking strangely at her.

"What?" Kai demanded.

"Ermm...sorry my Tallest, it just took me a second to recognize you without your uniform on."

"..." Kai shooked her head and crossed her arms and glared at Mah. "I want my uniform soon Mah, it's hardly fitting to be parading around in just this."

"I'll go check on it." Mah replied, but before she could rush down to the base the door bell rang.

Everyone froze, 'Not now...' Kai thought, for the device for her hologram disguise was with the rest of her uniform.

The bell was rang again followed by continous pounding. "Hey!" Came a somewhat familiar voice, "Come on Ren! Open up! We have to start this stupid project, it's due in two days."

No one moved, obviously hoping that the human would go away. Kai looked suspisciously at Ren, who helplessly shrugged. But Kai wasn't paying attention to that, no, what suddenly caught her attention was the fact that the door wasn't locked.

Her jaw dropped open as she stabbed the air repeatedly in the direction of the lock with her finger. Ren and Mah looked and their mouths dropped open as well. Mah turned to Spiffy, "You left the door unlocked?" She shouted.

Kai slapped her head, "The door's unlocked?" the voice asked, and they started to check for themself. Everyone else hastily activated their disguises, and Kai tried to find a place to hide. Unfortunately in her haste, she tripped into the hot tube.

-splash!-

She recovered and poked her head out of the water, and saw a blur come rushing towards her. It was Ren's SIR unit in it's squirrel disguise, RiKa leapt on to Kai's head. Kai was about to shake it off when a voice stopped her. "You guys have a hot tube in your den?"

Kai looked up and saw the large headed kid from Ren's class. Surprisedly, he wasn't pointing at Kai screaming alien. Out of the corner of her eye, Kai caught her reflection on the surface of a conviently placed mirror(3) It seemed that RiKa was able to project Kai's disguise as well as it's own. Though, the SIR unit was only able to project the head portion, as Kai could see her arms, just under the surface of the liquid, were normal. She causally sank deeper into the hot tube. Due to the volatile surface, one could not see what was under the water.

"Of course we do. What? It's suppose to be outside where everyone can see it?" T.K replied annoyedly to the big headed boy's question.

"Erm.." he didn't know how to answer to that one.

"Isn't rude to barge into other people's homes like this?" Mah asked

"Sorry Mrs...Ren's mom. It's just that Ms. Bitters will rain horrible doom upon us if the project isn't completed."

"Ermm..." Ren started, trying to remember his name, "Dib. We can't work on it here..."

"Why?"

"Umm...Because..." Ren started, trying to think up a reason.

"Because I say so." Kai said firmly.

Dib looked at T.K, "How do you have a say in this?" he asked.

"Because I am the Ta...umm...Oldest."

"That is a valid reason, as the t...Older, um, sibling she does get a say in this...debate." Mah replied.

"Besides," Ren added, "Isn't your father that Professor Rembrant?"

"Erm...you mean 'Membrane?'" Dib asked, getting somewhat suspiscious. Surely everyone knew about his father, everyone human that is.

"Yes, that's what I meant. What did I say?"

"Rembrant."

"Oh! Sorry about that, I was uhh..thinking about one of my favorite-"

"Actors!" Mah finished. She added, "Ren loves watching tv."

"Besides, surely you have all sorts of high tech stuff, your father being such a famous inventor/scientist and such. That would surely help out with the project." Ren said brightly.

"That is true, besides I need to check up on the live feed from Zim's base." Dib replied as Ren calmly, yet firmly lead him out of the house.

Once they left, Mah looked at Kai and replied, "Wow. I didn't realize heads could get that big. How do you think he manages to walk around without collasping on himself?" she asked.

Kai shrugged.

* * *

(1) hehe...Kai has a habit of jumping to conclusions...Anyhow, Rai thought it would be funny to add that line in. And I agree 

(2) Is that even a word? I type up stories on notepad so I can't spell check anything. And I am just curious to know if that is an actual word

(3)This artist picturessort of gave me the idea of how theTallest uniforms are put together.She does draw some RAPR pictures, so you have been warned(She also drew one of my favorite Tallest pics, in which Purple is laying in a tree with a flower shirt. It's funny and I like it : D ) Anyhow, she is on deviantart andher deviant name isgruddlypod I wasn't too sure if posting links were allowed, and I'm pretty sure you can find her gallery by looking up her user name. Yes. I am advertising again...I seem to do that quite a bit...sweat

Sidenote: The whole chapter was made just for that first line. The hot-tube part and the security measures at skool were added in because I was excedingly bored and thought it would be amusing. Not too mention this would have been one really short chapter if I had just ended it there. Hopefully you all have enjoyed it : D

Reviews are appreciated : )

Next chapter will be up by tommorrow sometime. I sort of need to find my jumpdrive to upload it...Anyhow, it will be up before the weekend ends, so put down the waffle.

Does anyone know why two words will sometimes be smashed together? I have been reading over the chapters and have just noticed this : P


	11. Chapter 10: Yay!

Yay! Found the jump drive, I'm so happy, it had my english paper on it : )

Disclaimer: I don't own the Charries of Invader Zim, of my friends. Just Kai

* * *

And like a brillant flash, the idea suddenly made itself known. 'It's perfect!' Kai thought, sitting up. Kai started snickering.

"Hmm...Very few people would share your views about the horrible affects of the Black Plague." Ms. Perky said.

Kai looked up, surprised. 'That's right...I'm still in this horrid classroom.' She thought.

'I have the idea...now how to go about it...' Kai wondered, and started to plot out various things while Ren was using the lunchtime to answer a call from Mah. To the rest of the world it looked like Ren was talking into a cell phone...that was connected by a thin cable to her back pack.  
"My T.K!" Ren started having finished the call with Mah. "It seems that Mah has finally fixed the ship!"  
Kai stared at the soldier, "Really?" she asked.  
Ren nodded, happy also that they would be able to leave this horrid rock.  
"Red won't know what hit him..." Kai started, snickering at the thought of finally being able to get back at him. The snicker soon turned into the loud, infectious, creepy cackling laughter that Irkens were infamous for(1). Ren joined in, and fairly soon the other dirt children in the food court laughed nervously along with the two Irkens, not having the slightest clue as to what was so funny. By the time that Zim and Dib (fighting as normal) entered the cafeteria, it was in a uproar. Noticing the entrance of the two, Ren stopped laughing. Poking to get her leader's attention, she pointed them out. Kai ceased with the loud laughter and settled for snickering quietly to herself...

"Mah! Let's go!" Kai called, slamming the door to their base shut.

The technician walked through the door clearing her throat and looking sheepishly at the ground.

"What is it?" Kai asked, eyes narrowing.

"Ummm..it's the ship, my Tallest..." Mah replied.

"It's not fixed?"

Mah swallowed nervously, "Errr...It was. You see, I was not able to completely repair the power core, it being damaged in the crash and all. But I managed to fix it up so that it would be able to get us back to the Massive. But still, the core was never really stable and..." she started quickly.

Ren looked up and noticed that Tallest Kai had her arms crossed and was lightly, but rapidly, tapping one finger. That was a sure sign that she was getting impatient.

"What happened to the core?" Ren asked. That helped Mah stop babbling and get her thoughts on track.

"Roughly thirty minutes ago, there was this strange surge. It made the core...erm...blow up."

Kai dropped her arms and exclaimed in shock "It blew up? How badly was the ship damaged?"

Mah shook her head and waved her hands "No, no, no. The core was outside the ship. I wanted to run a few more tests on it to double check that it would hold. This ship itself is fine, for it's right under the roof. The only thing it lacks is a power core to actually make it go."

"That's all?" Kai asked.

"Yes, my Tallest."

Kai stared at her for a moment, thinking, then glanced down at Ren. An idea suddenly popped into her head.

"All standard Invader bases use power cores for their secondary energy supply, right?"

"Uhhh...I believe so, my Tallest..." Ren replied slowly, not really sure of where this was going. Their base wasn't standard issue, so there was no power core to use.

"So Zim should have a few."

"Ye-What? We're going to ask the defective for help?" Ren slapped a hand over her mouth, 'Whoa, that came out too strong..' But Kai either didn't notice, or care.

"No, of course not. I don't plan on asking him anything."

"I'm sneaking in the base and stealing one?" Ren asked, grasping a hold of the plan.

"No. We're sneaking in the base," Kai said, indicating all of them. "And we're not stealing."

"What?"

"It's not stealing. I'm commanding that Zim is going to give up a power core. It's just a minor technicality that he doesn't know I'm issuing that order."

"No, I mean, you're coming too?" Ren asked, understanding why Mah might need to go.

Kai did the equivalent of raising an eyebrow.

"My Tallest, I mean no disrespect by that, it's just that given Zim's record with our past leaders, it might pose a r-"

Kai waved her off, "It'll be easier and quicker that way. Besides it's not like Zim is going to be there."

In their disguises once again, RiKa, Spiffy, Ren, Kai, and Mah hid in the shrubs that surrounded the defective's base. "And none of these earthlings find that house out of place?" Kai asked under her breath. Ren shrugged in answer, but then heard the door to the green house open and slam shut. They all watched as Zim and his SIR unit marched down the street, Zim congratulting himself on his most ingenious plan ever. "The Dib-Pig won't see this coming. I AM ZIM!"

"Finally, I thought he would never leave." Kai muttered getting up. As the group walked up to the front door, the gnomes scanned them, and seeing Kai through her disguise did nothing more.

'He leaves the door unlocked?' Kai thought as they entered into the house.

"What an interesting decor! Wow, it's much better than ours. I mean look at that picture! I'll have to ask Zim sometime where he got the ingenous color scheme." Mahsaid outloud,prancing around and looking at everything(2)Kai shook her head at that as they deactivated their disguises and said outloud, "Computer"

"Yes?" The computer replied, a bit surprise at having a Tallest, particularly one that the other two said was on vacation, be here.

"Where does Zim keep the power cores?"

"Storage bay four."

"Open an entrance then to Storage bay four"

"Umm...There really isn't an entrance to Storage bay four"

"There isn't?"

"No, not really. Zim never made one"

"Wouldn't he need one to access the storage bay?"

Kai could have swore that the computer was shrugging "You would think so, but there are two other storage bays like that"

"How does he get into the storage bay then?" Ren asked.

"I don't think he does"

"There's no way into the room?"

"Uh...Well, GIR can enter through the ventilation shaft"

Kai was silent for a moment as the image of Zim's dysfunctional SIR unit popped into her mind. "Zim's insane robot is able to access a room filled with power cores?" She askedmore than a little unnervedat the thought.

"Yes." The computer replied, also disliking that notion. "It's where GIR keeps his collection of tuna cans"

"Uh-huh..." Kai said slowly. Well, this was a bit of a problem. Even if Ren could fit in the ventilation shaft, there was no way a power core could. "Look. I want a power core. Is there any way of getting one from that storage bay?"

The computer was silent for a moment. "It could be teleported up here." it replied.

'Why didn't I think of that?' Kai thought, but outloud said, "That would work."

Within a few seconds a power core appeared. After looking it over, Mah indicated that Spiffy pick it up and said "Yup, this will work."

Kai nodded and said "Oh and by the way, Zim is to not know of us being here. So don't tell him"

"Wasn't planning to. Though you might want to reconsider going out the front door then"

Kai frowned, "Why?"

"Because Zim is walking up the front lawn"

Kai's mouth dropped in shock.

"Is there another way out of here?" Ren asked nervously.

"Uhh..that tube that Zim uses to throw away all the burnt up parts and stuff"

"I'm not goin-" Kai started, but shuddered when she heard Zim cursing the Dib and swearing revenge, "Okay, I'm gone." and she was the first to jump into the tube. Followed quickly by Ren, RiKa, Mah and Spiffy.

-A few seconds later-

"Hey, Spiffy, would you mind getting off of me?" Mah asked her SIR unitwho was sitting on top of her back, holding the core.

"Would you all mind getting off of me?" Kai asked, her voice muffled, for she was at the bottom of the pile. They quickly got off of Kai, and looked a bit sheepish for using their leader as a landing cushion. "That was fun..." Kai muttered, getting up. She turned and notice the human woman staring at them. It seemed that the tube lead to the neighbor's house.

"Uhh..." Kai started, not knowing what to say, for none of them wore disguises.

"Is it halloween (3) already? I better get the candy." The woman said walking away.

The Irkens looked at each other, a bit confused, but took the opportunity to activate their disguises and leave.

-Much later-  
"I can't believe that no one noticed the fact that a squirrel and a walking teddy bear were carrying a three foot hot dog (4)" Ren said as they settled into the ship.

Mah shrugged, "Hey, whatever works" she replied, starting up the engine.

"I don't care how delicious the planet looks from space, I never want to go there again." Kai muttered under her breath. But she perked up immediately as they left the planet's atmosphere. For soon they would be back on the Massive. And soon she would have her revenge...(5)

* * *

(1) I think Irkens have the coolest laugh, and I always wondered what the Tallest would sound like if they did the crackling laugh. (They generally snicker or just laugh. I don't think they ever did that evil laugh)

(2) Bit of Link's personality inserted in here. Like Mah, she is easily distracted and has a three second attention span : )

(3) Wrote this chapter in July. I just find it funny with it being October and everything.

(4) The power core is about a foot thick and three feet wide. Just imagine a hot dog that big.

(5) Now that I think about it, this reminds me of a movie...did I accidentally borrow a line? I don't exactly recall what movie it reminds me of, but oh well : )

All I will say about Kai's revenge is that inspiration for it came from looking out my bedroom window at home. That's all I'm going to tell you : P

Reviews are apperciated : D


	12. Chapter 11: Kai's Revenge

Invader Iza- Glad you liked your waffle :) I don't think it's my space bar, I think the reason is because of my spacing in story, if I double space between words, it does not do that. When I'm typing out chapters again, I will have to remember that.

DrIvoRobotnik- Glad you are liking the story so far, the ending I have thought of is greatness.

Tallest Kai: Not for me it's not.

Me: It's not like I killed you off

Tallest Kai: You might as well have

Me: Don't be so dramatic...

One-Black-Balloon- Thank you! I will try my best to not let the new chapters lack the effort and such that are in current ones : )

Disclaimer: Don't own IZ characters. Do own Kai and Ni though.

* * *

"Secret Inspection Trip..."Kai said slowly, settling into her chair on the command deck.

"Hey, we had to come up with some reason as to why you were missing for so long" Purple replied.

"Yeah, we couldn't really let on that you were actually stranded on some backwater planet." Red added.

"No thanks to you."

"Listen, if I had known you were going to be taking that ship, I would have hidden them somewhere else. I mean, do you know what I had to go through to get them? And I didn't even get to eat the stupid snacks because your power core incinerated them." Red seemed oblivious to the fact that both his co-leaders were more or less glaring at him now.

"Snack thief." Purple stated before shoving a nacho in his mouth.

"Like you've never done it." Red retorted, before devouring his own nachos.

"I don't go around hiding them in some random ship's engines though."

Red snorted. Like hiding the snacks there was really his first choice of places. It wasn't his fault that while he was making his way to deposit the ill-gotten snacks, Kai and Purple chose to walk in on him. Rather than get caught in the act, he had no choice but to dump them quickly. It just so happened that the place he chose was in the engine compartment of the ship that Kai was going to take later on.

"Anyhow," Purple started "The incident is behind us, right? Red has apologized for the matter."

"So we're even?" Red added.

Kai glanced at him.

-Insert flashback of 10 minutes earlier-

"So those are Red's nachos?"

"Yes, my Tallest." Service drone Ni (1) answered, somewhat confused at being stopped.

"Okay, wait a moment." Kai pulled out a little tube like container and shook its contents onto the nachos. Luckily, the stuff blended in well with the cheese.

"Errr...seasoning?" Ni asked, a bit nervous.

"Yup. But don't worry. It's not deadly. Won't even make him sick. Even so, he still can't know about it." Kai said the last part in a happy voice that also carried along the threat 'And if you warn him, you'll be sorry'  
"Erm..whatever you say my Tallest." Ni said, a bit unsure. He would still serve the nachos with the special 'seasoning', but afterwards he planned on staying out of sight for a bit, so that Tallest Red wouldn't remember that he had been the one that served the nachos. Kai waited a moment for the service drone to get a ways ahead of her, before entering onto the command deck herself.

-end flashback-

Careful not to smirk as he ate his last nacho Kai replied, "Yeah, I suppose we are even...now..."

Red looked at her suspicously, 'she's up to something...' He thought, licking his fingers. Sure, it had been a week since she got back to the Massive and nothing had happened, but Red was still expecting some sort of revenge. It wasn't her style to let something like that slide. He sure as wouldn't if he had been in the same situation.

-Two hours later-

"And that's phase one," Zim said, not skipping a beat. "Phase two is even more ingenious. More EVIL!" And he continued explaining his latest plan for the earth's demise.

"How does he still manage to contact us even though we change the tansmission codes amost every day?" Kai asked under her breath.

"I don't know," Purple replied "But it's creepy."

Zim had gotten around the latest communication lock, and had been talking for the past hour and a half. But only Kai and Purple had the misfortune of being there. Red had left a few minutes, to get a something, before Zim appeared on the screen. He had of course since come back, but seeing who was on the screen, he didn't bother with going back into the command room. Instead, he smirked and waved at the other Tallest, who could see him in the doorway, and left for his chambers. They could suffer through this Zim transmission.

"Do you have any idea what he is saying?" Kai asked Purple

"Not really. He lost me at the dancing gopher of doom. What's a gopher?"

Kai shrugged, "I don't know."

"Weren't you on that planet for a few weeks?"

"What's your point?"

Purple just stared at her.

"Look, the planet was disturbing enough with the few details I had to learn to blend in. Why on Irk, would I have any interest in learning more about it? Besides, it's more of an Invader's job to do all that..."

"GIR! What are you-Don't touch THAT!"

The Tallest turned their attention back to the screen as Zim's SIR unit grabbed something out of Zim's hand and exclaimed, "Scary Monkey Time!"

"NO! That's not the tv re-"

"MONKEY!" GIR interrupted, giggling as he pressed some large red button on the remote.

There was a decent sized explosion right before the transmission was cut. The Tallest stared at the blank screen for a moment, before Purple spoke up.

"That was...interesting."

"Yeah...though I have to rate it a 6. The last explosion was at least twice as big..."

"An 8, for it's probably going to set off a chain reaction."

"Really? It didn't seem that it was strong enough to set off a chain reaction..."

"10 monies to say it did"

"Okay, you're on. You," Kai said pointing out a random technician, "Restore the communication line."

Within a few seconds the screen flashed on again, though only for a few seconds before the feed was lost, but it was enough to prove a point.

"Drat" Kai said, reluctantly giving Purple the 10 monies.

"Think Zim got destroyed?" he asked, pocketing away the cash.

"Nope."

"I suppose if that black hole didn't do it, then a mere explosion would hardly be expected to. Pity though."

Kai shrugged and replied, "At least he provides some entertainment every once and a while."

"Yeah, that's true..." Purple said slowly as something caught his attention. He looked at his and Kai's basket of nachos

"What?"

"Nothing...I'm just wondering why Red's basket is glowing..."

"Finally, I was starting to wonder if it was going to work."

As if to confirm that, there was a muffled, girlish sound of Red screaming.

Purple looked at Kai, who had this remarkable evil smirk. She quickly got up and made her way to view her handy work.  
Purple followed right behind her, "What did you do?" he asked Kai, but she just smirked even more.

They got to the door that lead into the lounge area just as the door opened, revealing a more than slightly ticked off Red.

Purple's mouth dropped open in sheer surprise.Red was now...well...pink. If that wasn't enough, his skin wasn't the settled sort of pink either. Red glanced quickly up and down the hall before he yanked the other two Tallest into the lounge and quickly closed the door.

"What is this?" Red exclaimed, indicating his discolored skin. "How the Irk did I wake up to being pink?" He asked, though he knew Kai was behind it.

"Well, I was trying for a different color. But this is...much better..." Kai said trying to keep a straight face, even his eyes had a slight pinkish tint to them.

"Maybe we should have some pink added to his uniform so that it matches better." Purple added almost losing it.

Red turned and glared at Kai, who was starting to snicker. "If this is permenant..." he threatened

"It's not...give or take two or so weeks, it should wear off." She managed to reply between snickers.

He was trying so hard not to laugh hysterically, that Purple placed a hand on the wall for support. As luck would have it, he hit the switch that turned off the lights, and Red was seen in all of his pink glowing glory. The sight caused both Kai and Purple to lose it completely.

Red growled and left in a huff to his quarters, muttering about something less than complimentary. A few minutes and many puns (2)later, Kai and Purple calmed down enough to leave the lounge and head back to the command deck.

"That turned out far better than I thought it would." Kai said.

"I hope this doesn't start off another type of prank war between you two." Purple said, remembering such an event happening a few years back.

Kai glanced at the violet Tallest, "Doubt so. There are like specific unspoken rules for this sort of thing. Red is pretty good at following them, as am I."

"He's also good at finding ways around rules."

"True that may be, I don't see how he could with these rules. They are pretty cut and dry. It's not like there's some sort of holiday that just allows random pranking for no reason."

Purple shrugged at that comment, you just could never tell with Red.

* * *

(1) I got tired of writing just service drone. So I gave him a name. Which, in case some of you haven't seen the show, I got from the Holy Grail movie. Service Drone Ni...Got to love it : ) 

(2) My original plan for this chapter was to write in a ton of puns. The problem is that I hate puns, and so I could not bring myself to intentionally place them in my story. It was just too painful.

This chapter may seem quite short, but this is only about half of the original chapter. The rest of it was an introducing of the plot that would take over the next two chapters after it. But I didn't like how the very last chapter came out too much. Because the outcome of it rested heavily on Ren. Well, my friend has not finished that chapter, it's sort of where we all stopped with the group fanfic. And so I just gave a very vague ending because it bothered me thatit was unfinished. I'm highly doubting I'll be posting those chapters. But if it seems the majority of you want me to, I will.The general idea was that Zim accidentally infects the Tallest with the earthen flu. If this sounds familiar it's because this idea has been/is being done by another fanfic author, in the story 'The Favour of Doom' I liked the idea so much that I emailed the author to ask permission to use it. She said yes : ) Anyhow, her story is really good. She just has not updated in about a month or two...(Yes...I am advertising her fic a little : D )

I have thought up an ending for this story. It is pretty cool if I do say so myself. But I realize I have quite a bit of half baked plot ideas strewn thoughout this fic. So if you, the reader, want me to expand on one of them, email me or say so in a review : ) (If you email me, say fanfiction or something like that in the subject line. Otherwise, I'll put it off as spam and delete it.)

The ending itself is going to take a while to do, cause I have to introduce two other main fan characters somehow, as well as do some major expanding on the one that is to be the villian, so to speak. Yes, I'm being very vague, cause I want it to be a surprise.

Finally, the current plot I am working on, I sort of need help with some details.And I'll let you all decide. If the Tallest were going to shrink, would it be better for all of them to do so at the same time, or to have only two of them shrink? Or only one of them? If so, choose which one(s). I have ideas for any combination, but I'm too indecisive to pick out one of them, eventually they are all going to be short, but it need not be till near the end of the plot idea.

Pardon for the long author's note, hope you enjoyed, read and review : )


	13. Ch 12: The AlmightyTallest?

Invader Iza: A waffle parade, huh? That's interesting...but hey! Free waffles!

Invader Sideos: Hmm...I'll try to change the lack of action thing, but am glad you like the characters. I haven't stopped writing, it's just that now I have to start from scratch to upload more chapters on here. So it's going to take me longer to update than it did when I already had the chapters typed up and could just edit and then upload them.

Pardon for the long time in updating. I get easily distracted and so typing out the chapter took longer than I thought it would. Iwas thinking about waiting till I finishedtyping out the current plot before updating, but I also told someone I would update beforeThanksgiving. Well, I'm going to be without a computer for about a week, so I highly doubt I would finish typingbefore I left

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters of IZ, Mah, Red, or Zene. I do own Kai

* * *

"Red? What are you doing here?" Kai asked, hovering into the lounge, surprised at seeing the crimson Tallest enter through the other door at the same time.

"I could ask the same of you, Kai. It's yours and Purple's turn to deal with the quartly report stuff."

"Nooo...it's yours and Purple's turn to deal with the reports. I had to do them last time."

"So did I."

"Well, yeah. That's because it was Purple's turn to skip. The time before that you didn't-" Kai stopped mid-sentence and thought about that. "Wait. Yes you did. That was the time you got mad at the computer clipboard for not working correctly, threw it on the table and caused it to explode, setting the other documents on fire. And then we had to order more copies and start over. Real smooth by the way. It took the rest of the day to finish them...and then there was the table that had-"

"Hang-on." Red jumped in, having just realized something. "If you and I did the reports last time and the time before that..."

"So, Red. What are you planning to do with your free day?" Kai asked, flopping into a chair.

"I don't know. I'm thinking, lounging and laughing at the thought of Purple having to do all those reports himself." Red replied, flopping into his own chair, and picking up a platter of cookies that had been set on the table.

"Wow, what a coincidence. I planned on doing the exact same thing." Kai said, snagging a few of the cookies for herself.

-In another part of the Massive-

Purple whistled to himself as he hovered down the hall. 'Pity I can't skip again. But skipping four times in a row would be sort of obvious. Even to those two.' he thought idly entering into the convention room. He paused and looked around.

"Where is Red and or Kai?" He asked one of the advisors that were scurrying around.

He paused to answer: "They called a few minutes ago to say sorry that they wouldn't be able to come in to do the reports, because there seems to be exceedingly important inventory work on sector 12.." He said the last part a bit unsure of himself, for if memory served, sector 12 was one of the Tallest's lounge areas. Not any sort of storing room.

It took half a second for that to process in his mind and when it did, he let out a huge sigh and reluctantly took his seat at the table. They apperently figured out what he did and now he was going to have to pay for it. 'I wonder if I could fake being sick...' He thought, as he pulled the first stack of reports to him.

-Many hours later-

'I swear...He's going to be the downfall of us all.' Purple thought darkly. That Irken had been a thorn in the Empire's side since day one. And the violet Tallest had just spent the last few hours dealing with the most recent Zim related problem. Sometime ago, the self-proclaimed Invader had contacted Vort and requested and received a file download from one of the imprisoned scientist. That in itself was not the problem, for that was normal. But apparently, Zim did not bother to do a secure download or even run any sort of scan on the file. Long story short: A bundle of technical problems that the Empire had been experiencing the past few months were traced to that incident. If the paperwork and reports associated with that weren't head ache enough, there was the fact that a few scientists from the prison planet may have had escaped unnoticed, because of the security leak that was found a few weeks ago. Which was could also be traced back to Zim.

'This has been a very looong day...' Purple thought wearily. He was on his way to see what the other two Tallest were up to. Not once had either of them come and gloat about not having to do the reports. Which was just plain weird to begin with. Add that to the fact that no one else on the Massive had seen them all day. Not even the service drones in the food court had seen a trace of them, nor had they been called upon to deliever snacks to Red and Kai. For all Purple could tell, they never left the lounge and didn't call anyone into the lounge all day.

Which caused Purple to worry a bit. Despite being 7 feet tall, Kai still had the attention span of a smeet at times, getting her to stay in a room all day (unless snacks and some form of entertainment was provided) would be like trying to push Sizz-Lor out a porthole. Sure, it could be done, with alot of pain and hardwork, but it was near impossible.(1) The similiar thing applied to Red, though it was to a lesser degree and stemmed from the fact that he got bored easily.

"What are you two do-" Purple started to say as he opened the door and entered. He paused, more than a little confused at what he saw. The other two Tallest were no where to be found, instead the only signs of them were their uniforms that were strewned a little on the floor. 'What the?' Purple thought, trying to comprehend this strange turn of events.

"That's good." Came a voice that sounded alot like Kai's. "We were worried that you were one of the shorter Irkens. Boy, would that have been really awkward."

Purple looked around the room, trying to find Kai. There was a huge sigh, and then Red's voice said, "Look closer to the ground."

Purple dropped his gaze and noticed the two really short Irkens that stood there staring up at him. One was a blue-eyed female, the other was a red-eyed male. Both wore standardized red, black striped, black pants uniforms that were a bit big on them. Height wise, it seemed like they should both still be in the education plug back on Irk. How did they wind up here? Purple stared at them.

"Red? Kai?" He asked, very confused.

"No...It's just a huge coincidence that we are two Irkens who have two fingers and happen to share the same voice, eye-color, pak design, as them...Of course it's us!" Kai snapped. She wasn't happy with the fact that she suddenly lost 5 and 1/2 feet in height.

Purple sat down in a chair stunned. "You're..."

"Don't say it." Red warned.

"You're..."

"Purple..."

"Short...really, really short...really, really, really-"

"We know!" Red exclaimed, throwing up his hands, "Trust me. We know"

"How?"

"I don't know, one minute we were talking about the newest shipment from the Cythlean Republic, the next I suddenly wake up, trapped inside my own uniform. You wouldn't believe how hard it is to open those chest armor things from the inside." Kai muttered the last part to herself.

"Wait, there was a shipment from the Cythlean Republic? Why wasn't I told?"

"Because the last time the snacks arrived here, you took all the flaens."

Purple was about to reply to that, but Red interruppted. "As interesting as this conversation is getting, there's a more pressing matter at hand. Like how I went from being an Almighty Tallest to being..."

"An Almighty Shortest?" Purple ventured, grinning a little.

Kai started snickering, but stopped when Red simply stated, "Don't know why you're laughing."

'You know? This could actually be a good thing...' Purple started to think to himself. Afterall, he was now the only Tallest. No longer did he have to share power with Kai and Red. Though that also meant, no longer did they divide up the work that went with the position. Days like today, where he would be stuck doing paperwork and whatnot all day would be more common place. Then there was the fact that he would have basically no one to converse, joke around, goof off or really anything like that. But then again, with all the extra work, it's not like he would have a ton of free time to begin to miss that.

Purple started to smirk, but then stopped as another thought popped into his brain. He would be the only one who would have to deal with Zim. The annoying little defective that some how managed to contact them at least once every few days. And with depressing frequency, sometimes 2 times in one day. No matter what they did in trying to block him, he somehow always found a way to get through. And then there was the incredible amount of paper work, reports, and meetings that were also tied to the Invader whenever he did something incredibly stupid. Which was about once every week or so. As it stood, they shuffled the various Zim issues between them so that they could all keep their sanity. But if Kai's and Red's condition was permenant, Purple would have to deal with it all...by himself. The very thought made him shiver.

"Okay. If you're done with thinking about how this incident may be beneficial to you, can we move on with trying to reverse it?" Kai asked suddenly.

Purple looked at her, "Huh? What makes you think that I was thinking about that?"

Red and Kai stared at him pointedly and Red replied, "First off you had that smirk for a few seconds and then it changed into a grimace."

"So?"

"So..." Kai replied, "Do you really think you are the first one of us three to have thought about what it would be like if the other two Tallest somehow...lost their positions?"

Purple didn't really know how to reply to that. After a brief moment of silence he said, "Well, I suppose we could go down to the fourth level and have the scientist run a few tests on you to figure out what the cause of your downsizing is."

Red crossed his arms and stared at him.

"What?"

"Oh, he's against that idea. I brought it up earlier." Kai replied.

"If you worried that no one will believe that you are...well..you, I will be there to vouch." Purple said.

Red snorted, "That's not the point. It would be devasting for our image for word of this mishap to get around. Especially for you." Red replied indicating to Purple.

"Yeah...That is true. It would look pretty bad for you Purple." Kai agreed. And Purple had to nod.

"Oh! I got it. I'll take a sample and then take it down there myself."

"Right, and just how do you plan to do that?" Red asked.

Purple looked around. "Here, I'll just use this to scrap off a skin sample or something."

"Wha? You aren't coming near us with that!" Kai exclaimed when Purple held up the slightly sharp object.

"Do you want to know what's wrong or not?" Purple asked

"Well, yeah. But really, you only need a sample from one of us...So thanks Kai for volunteering." Red added suddenly, moving back behind her.

"I'm not goin-Hey! Don't come any clos-AHH!" Kai yelled turning to run away. Red causally stuck a foot out and Kai, of course, tripped and crashed head first into the desk. When she came too a minute later, she noticed Purple leaving the room.

"You jerk." She stated to Red, as she got up.

"He only need a skin sample. It's not like you can tell." Red replied, pointed to her arm and she looked. Indeed, there was only the faintest indication that something had been scraped there.

"Well then, why didn't you volunteer?"

"Like I was going to let him do that to me. Do you not remember the incident at Devastis?" (2)

Kai muttered darkly under her breath.

-30 minutes later-

"So, it's some sort of chemical compound is responsible?" Red asked, when Purple had returned and handed him the report one of the scientist made.

Purple popped another cookie in his mouth and shrugged. "The only thing that the scientist found interesting was the presence of some unknown chemical. So yeah, I figure that is what caused this whole thing. The deal is, how would that have been introduced into your bodies?"

Kai shrugged and said, "Working on that. We have a theory, but it hasn't been proven yet."

"Oh?" Purple said, about to ask what that theory was, but the sound of someone knocking on the door made him pause. Kai quickly hide, and Purple stood up and shoved Red into a drawer, for the other 'Tallest' had been too busy reading the report to have noticed the noise, and quickly closed it before Red realized what happened. Just in time too, for the Irken who knocked entered the room.

"Mah, what do you-" Purple paused more than a little surprised at what he saw. The Irken was a red-eyed male. And he was taller than Mah. And only 6in shorter than Purple himself. The Irken seemed equally as surprised to see Purple.

"You?" The Irken asked confused at something.

"Yes. Me. You...Who are you?" Purple replied equally at a lost.

The Irken recovered himself. "Oh, pardon me, my Tallest. I'm Zene(3) I was just transferred here, and umm..wanted the honor of meeting all of you. I heard that you were in here. If you don't mind me asking, where are Tallest Kai and Tallest Red?"

"Oh, they're busy at the moment. In anycase, nice to meet you, but next time wait for a reply before barging in. That's liable to get you imprisoned." Purple replied.

Zene nodded sheepishly, "Thank you sir." and left.

Purple fell back into his chair, for he was a bit at a lost. But mainly because he felt a bit woozy.

"You should have intarrogated him." Kai said as she left her hiding place. There was a slight banging noise from the drawers but they both ignored it.

"Huh? Why?"

"Right. He just...just transferred here and wanted the honor of meeting us."

"You've lost me."

"Did you see how tall he was? Mah is the only Irken close to us in height, so where did he pop up from?" Kai asked.

Purple shrugged, not catching on and really starting not to feel well now.

"Trust me. I would have noticed this Zene before. I beat he's somehow involved in this."

Standing up to see if it would help, Purple asked "How often do you check for that sort of thing?" (4)

"Oh, only a couple of times every mon-Hey, are you okay?"

Purple was about to answer but collasped, unconscious, as a sharp pain ripped through his body...

* * *

(1) I have not clue why I thought up that analogy. But when I typed it out and looked at it again, I started cracking up. Because Purple sounds like he knows this from experience and that got me thinking (Porthole is a small circular window for those who might not know the word)

(2) Surely in Devastis they had some lessons or another similiar to ours in biology. How else would they know how to experiment on a specimen? Anyhow, let's just say Purple wasn't the best student...

(3) My online rp friend, created this character for a plot we were doing. I liked him so much, I asked if I could use him in my fic. She agreed, thanks Amazon

(4) Yes. Kai keeps tabs on any Irken thatseems to have a height advantage over the general population... Wouldn't surprise me if Red and Purple did that as well...

The next chapter will probably be up a week after Thanksgiving. Notice I say, probably. I make no promises...()


	14. ch 13: Kai's elevator

Wow. Haven't updated in a while, huh?

I've sort of been busy slacking off...

-Coughs-

Anyhow, you all should be happy to know that I'm almost done with the ending for this plot and the begginning of the next one. I'm not going to give any specific time dates as to when they'll be uploaded, but it should be a shorter wait than it was for this one

Hi Link! Glad you found this story, oh, before I forget, my DA account is Tallest-kai

There's not much there, but in Jan, I'll have access to my scanner again and be able to upload the comics that Link and I have been working on over winter break. They are about Kai, Ren, Mah and their adventures on Earth. (For there were quite a few that I never bothered to make into a fic. But now they are comics! Art by Link of course, I just help with storyboarding and such )

-sound of mad crackling in the background-

...Oookay. Kai is happy with gaining the loyalty of a new Invader : P

Glad that the story is still good to some people

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of IZ. Just Kai.

* * *

"Geeze that looked rather painful...glad I was unconscious for it" Purple heard Kai say. He felt sluggish and answered with a groggy "Huh?" and opened his eyes. 

Kai came into focus and Purple shot up, or at least tried to.

"Yeah...Getting out of those things is a tad bit difficult. But -" The loud sound of something breaking made Kai paused. Both she and Purple, though he had to tilt back his head, looked and saw Red, fairly ticked, getting out of the drawer. In his haste to hide Red, Purple had forgotten that the drawers locked automatically. 'Uh-oh...' He thought when Red noticed Purple short and still trapped in his uniform and his faced changed from anger to an evil sort of smirk.

"Ahhh!" Purple exclaimed when Red started to advance in his direction. He, somehow, managed to pull his head through the collar and take refuge in the chest armor.

Kai suppressed a snicker at the sight but said, "We don't have time for this. Come on, it's not like Red is going to do anything dras--" she tapered off to silence as she looked at Red. "Red?" She asked slowly.

"Yeeess?" Red replied innocently.

"What is that?"

"Oh, this?" Red asked, as if he had just noticed the 10 pound rubber mallet (1) he had been holding in his hands.

"Yes...That..."

"It's nothing really...just sort of picked it up..."

'From where?' Kai wondered. "Oh...In that case, can you just sort of put it back down? We can't exactly work together to try and reverse the situation if you and Purple get into a fight." She replied, though added silently, 'Or if you pummel Purple senseless...'

Red reluctantly dropped the mallet, and after reassuring Purple that Red wasn't going to get back at him, yet anyway, they soon were all sitting on the floor, debating their next course of action.

"Wait. You guys suspected the cookies and you didn't tell me?"

"If we did, would you have eaten them?" Kai asked.

Purple snorted, "No, of course not."

"Exactly. We needed a way to be sure the cookies were the source." Red added.

Purple muttered something under his breathe, but asked out loud "So, now what?"

"First, we find the being responsible. Force them to tell us where they got this shrinking chemical and who made it, and then make them to reverse the effects." Red replied.

"And I say we start with Zene." Kai added.

"I admit that he is suspicious, but we can't exactly run around the Massive trying to find him. That would take far too long." Red replied.

"So what are you suggesting we do?" Purple asked.

"Simple, go to where our snacks are made and check there. Zene saw that you weren't short. So if he is somehow involved in this, he or whoever he is working with, will probably be trying to taint some other food."

"Oh, and I suppose you know how to get to that particular kitchen from here?" Purple asked. Red sort of looked around, avoiding him, but Kai answered, "I do!"

"Really?"

"Yes. Follow me!" Kai jumped up and started marching to the door.

"She's going to have a hard time going anywhere from there." Red muttered to Purple as Kai got to the door and opened it.

"Well? Come on!"

"Kai...you do realize that's a closet?" Purple asked.

"No...really? With all the times I have been in this room, I've never noticed that." Kai replied looking pointedly at the other two. They looked at each other, shrugged and followed Kai in the closet.

"Yes...I can definitely see how being in this closet is helping." Red commented.

"Hey! I found my paddle ball!" Purple exclaimed, scooping up the toy thing from under one of the shelves.

Kai ignored them, looking around for something. 'I should have found it already...Wait a minute...' She thought to herself. Out loud she asked, "Hey, which way is the main door?"

Red stared at her for a few seconds before replying, "That way." Indicating the direction with a finger.

"Whoops..." Kai said, looking sheepish, "It's the other closet..."

Both Red and Purple stared at her incredulously.

-In the other closet-

"See? I know what I am doing." Kai said, pressing some hidden button. One of the walls slid open.

"Why is there an elevator here?" Purple wondered out loud.

"Oh. Remember the time when Zim took control of the Massive?"

"Yes."

"I was stuck in here for a day and a half before the technicians managed to clear out the debris blocking the door. Recall the time that the emergency lock-down button was activated?"

"Yes..." (2)

"Well, in that incident I was locked in here for another day. Anyhow, there were about two other events like that were I was trapped in here for hours on end. So I had Mah build this."

"And it leads to the royal kitchen?" Red asked. (3)

"I suppose so."

"You suppose?"

"Well, I don't really know which kitchen that is, but this goes to all of them."

"All of them...all 12 of them?"

"Yes"

"Wait. We only have 12 kitchens? I thought it was 18?" Purple asked.

"Don't know what you are counting as kitchens, but we only have 12 of them." Red replied.

"Have either of you two even been in a kitchen on the Massive?" Kai asked.

"Erm...No..." Red admitted, and Purple shook his head.

"Neither have I. Isn't that weird? We've had this ship for like a century and a half and none of us have ever been to one of the kitchens. That's kind of funny when you think about it." Kai commented.

"Why would we go into a kitchen?" Purple started, but Red interrupted. "Wait. You've never used this?"

Kai shook her head.

"Then how do you know that it even goes to a kitchen?" Red asked.

"Oh. I told Mah to build it that way."

"Uh-huh...why?" Red asked slowly.

"Well, it was sort of a mix-up with words. I meant to say 'Cafeteria' but kitchen came out instead."

"Well...It's definitely convenient..." Purple said after a moment of silence. Kai shrugged and walked into the elevator, and the other two leaders followed. Using her spider legs to observe the button panel she said, "Well. I suppose we'll go in order." and pressed the first one.

The elevator shuddered and went up a little, before jerking to the left for a few seconds then shooting down, stopping, and then shooting left again for couple of seconds before halting completely.

"I think Mah might need to fix this thing..." Red commented, from where he laid on the floor. Purple had stumbled into him on the first left sending them both to the ground. As she was still on her robotic legs, Kai was the only one that didn't lose her balance.

"Hey. Does this look like the royal kitchen?" She asked looking through the door.

"Uhh..." Red started, getting to his feet and staring through the door himself. "I don't know...don't see a sign or anything..."

"No. It's not." Purple replied confidently.

Both Red and Kai looked at him. "How do you know that?" Kai asked.

"Because, yaelins take about two hours to make."

He received strange looks from both Kai and Red.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Red asked.

"I placed an order for them on my way back to the lounge. It's only been an hour and a half."

"Oh..." Kai said, understanding the implications, "Is that why it took you so long to get back with the results?"

"Erm...yes..." Purple replied.

"Great! This should make finding the right kitchen easier. Next button, Kai." Red said.

Kai nodded and pressed the second button. The elevator shuddered and then shot backwards, causing all three of them to lurch forward...

* * *

(1) I have a weird fascination for rubber mallets. I've been waiting to find some way to insert one into the story... 

(2) Of course he remembered. Purple was the one who accidentally pressed the lockdown button. He had mistook it for the button that brought up drinks. (Don't ask why those two were next to each other...)

(3) 'Royal Kitchen' I particularly don't like the name. But I couldn't think up of anything else, but if any of you do, please tell

shortish chapter, I know. Hope you enjoyed all the same

Reviews/comments/stuff is appreciated


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